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Best nicknames. 13:30 - Jul 25 with 5514 viewsPommyhoop

Spin off thread from the Surname thread .
Whats the best nickname youve come across.Its got to be real tho .Not some mad monicer from your fave rock band.
I'm sticking by 'Two Dads' .The owner of this nickname has a double barrelled French/English surname like Laurent Smythe or something .
When I first heard it I was 'whose this 'Two Dads ' you are onnabout?''
Pissed myself when they told me,,

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Best nicknames. on 17:38 - Jul 25 with 1736 viewsgordanoR

I have a good mate nicknamed Moon as he has fking massive head.
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Best nicknames. on 17:39 - Jul 25 with 1736 viewseghamranger

Mate of mine used to call this nice looking blonde girl who was thick as heck Junction 9.

Junction 9 of the M25 is Leatherhead!
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Best nicknames. on 17:53 - Jul 25 with 1720 viewshoof_hearted

I know of a bloke called 18 months.

Got one and a half ears.
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Best nicknames. on 18:14 - Jul 25 with 1708 viewsjohnhoop

The cricket club I used to play for in the 80's was great for coming up with nicknames.
One of the openers answered to the name of "Snail" because of his slow scoring rate, a guy who was always owing people money was called "Debts", another guy who was very partial to fast food after the game went by the name of "Kentucky". There was also a lad who was a brilliant cricketer in his own right but who had a father who was something of a local fast bowling legend and was therefore usually referred to as "Son of Ted".
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Best nicknames. on 18:38 - Jul 25 with 1695 viewsMonahoop

Best nicknames. on 17:39 - Jul 25 by eghamranger

Mate of mine used to call this nice looking blonde girl who was thick as heck Junction 9.

Junction 9 of the M25 is Leatherhead!


Like that.

In one of my old jobs, the ambulance service, nearly everyone had a nickname it was as one would say, par of the course. If you had an odd surname, we would twist them a bit. Worked with a bloke who's surname was Osbalderstone, so he became Oddb@llocks. Another guy was Triptree so he became Stumblebranch. There was some old tart working for us as the story goes, boasted to some [ but not me ] she had rather large nipples so she was called Scammell, after the lude term, nipples as big as Scammell wheelnuts. She was proud of that too. There were many others. Mine was Zen as I was told I had this knack of predicting or making things mysteriously happen before they did. It might have happened a couple of times but the name stuck.

There aint half been some clever bastards.

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Best nicknames. on 18:46 - Jul 25 with 1675 viewsTacticalR

Princess Anne's husband was known as 'foggy' because he was thick and wet.

Air hostess clique

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Best nicknames. on 18:48 - Jul 25 with 1678 viewsPommyhoop

Sorry Ive just remembered my favourite.
''Two Dads '' has been relegated to mumber 2 in my nickname chart.
'Tree'
Back in the 80's in the days of the casual attire one fella down the pub was wearing a pair of brown cords acompanied by a lovely green jumper.
One of the local wags who was on his 2nd purple ohm said 'You look like a tree'
That was that.His name from then on was 'Tree'.

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Best nicknames. on 20:27 - Jul 25 with 1626 viewsToast_R

My dad worked with an ex soldier who served in Korea. He was a specialist in hand to hand combat and his trick was asking his younger colleagues to come at him with a prop for a knife before showing them how fast he could disarm them whilst promptly getting them in a hold and throwing the unlucky assailant across the warehouse.

Henceforth he was know as "The Thrower"
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Best nicknames. on 21:55 - Jul 25 with 1582 viewsJohnnyByrnesmullet

Best nicknames. on 20:27 - Jul 25 by Toast_R

My dad worked with an ex soldier who served in Korea. He was a specialist in hand to hand combat and his trick was asking his younger colleagues to come at him with a prop for a knife before showing them how fast he could disarm them whilst promptly getting them in a hold and throwing the unlucky assailant across the warehouse.

Henceforth he was know as "The Thrower"


A career in catering has had me working with many different nationalities
Whilst working in an establishment near Heathrow had an Indian chef working with me by the name of Hardeep, he was named "is yer love" which I thought was genius.
A few years later working in Dublin had a Chinese porter working for me called "Hu bin"
We always sang to him uh bin talking in your sleep and he was duly named Sleep.
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Best nicknames. on 22:05 - Jul 25 with 1565 viewsPommyhoop

Best nicknames. on 16:06 - Jul 25 by Pommyhoop

Bubs.
Little Indian kid who used to blow spit bubbles all the time if he wasnt doing anything else constructive like.
He started off as Bubbles but ended up as Bubs
He died in a car crash with 3 of his mates aged 18.
RIP Bubs...


F'ck .Getting emotional about Bubs.His older brothers name was Aneel.Us white kids couldnt do that
so it was Annual.I think back now how I used to get on the same bus as him going to my first job ,him going to college.And I was like ahh bollx I have to talk to 'serious ,intense Annual again'. He'd lost his brother FFS..He was intense tho.He ended up getting absolutely massive by weight training before us mortals had even heard of steroids.
Bubs was a star tho.He could do it all.Got on with everyone ,black ,white whatever.Breakdance,play football ,proper bird bandit.He was a good boxer too.
Even his Mum ,a little Indian lady in a sari and his sister called him Bubs.
He was with his mates and the car left the motorway into the trees.They recon everyone in the car was wrecked '
proper mullered ,heads off ,body's caved in but Bubs was unmarked.F'ck I can still remember Annual saying He must of been bobbing and weaving right till the end. F'cking sad.
RIP Bubs.

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Best nicknames. on 22:19 - Jul 25 with 1544 viewsWeaverQPR

Two shits. You know the sort , if you've had one shit hes had two.

@WeavQPR

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Best nicknames. on 22:27 - Jul 25 with 1547 viewsTHEBUSH

Me and 3 mates were given nicknames by two smart lawyers, (why is another story.)
Anyway, they called us, the Professor, Mouthpiece, Bodyguard and Dr Death.
They got 3 right except mine
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Best nicknames. on 22:34 - Jul 25 with 1541 viewsMetallica_Hoop

There was a bloke at school called Raman Gandotura (sp) he had a glandular problem so was massive (genuine problem).

So everyone called him Gandi

Beer and Beef has made us what we are - The Prince Regent

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Best nicknames. on 02:42 - Jul 26 with 1486 viewsBrianMcCarthy

Best nicknames. on 22:05 - Jul 25 by Pommyhoop

F'ck .Getting emotional about Bubs.His older brothers name was Aneel.Us white kids couldnt do that
so it was Annual.I think back now how I used to get on the same bus as him going to my first job ,him going to college.And I was like ahh bollx I have to talk to 'serious ,intense Annual again'. He'd lost his brother FFS..He was intense tho.He ended up getting absolutely massive by weight training before us mortals had even heard of steroids.
Bubs was a star tho.He could do it all.Got on with everyone ,black ,white whatever.Breakdance,play football ,proper bird bandit.He was a good boxer too.
Even his Mum ,a little Indian lady in a sari and his sister called him Bubs.
He was with his mates and the car left the motorway into the trees.They recon everyone in the car was wrecked '
proper mullered ,heads off ,body's caved in but Bubs was unmarked.F'ck I can still remember Annual saying He must of been bobbing and weaving right till the end. F'cking sad.
RIP Bubs.


Ah, Pom, sorry for your loss. Feel your pain.

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Best nicknames. on 05:55 - Jul 26 with 1469 viewsFearless

At work years ago, I joined a new team. They all kept referring to 1 guy as "decaf"
Which I assumed was a coffee reference

Turned out it was DKAFE - " Doesn't Know Arse From Elbow"

Not sure if this was original or is a well known nickname, but it's always stuck with me.

Also know a group of blokes who all have nicknames except for "no-nickname Dean"
[Post edited 26 Jul 2014 5:56]
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Best nicknames. on 07:26 - Jul 26 with 1488 viewseasthertsr

Rumour has it, that cricketer Adam Lyth is known as TAPS in the Yorkshire dressing room- Thick As Pig Sh1t !
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Best nicknames. on 12:25 - Jul 26 with 1437 viewscalders

Went to end of season fans game at loftus rd a couple of years ago, was in springbok after the game when I overheard a classic conversation between to old boys, one said to the over "ere I haven't seen kunt face around in a while have you?" Other guy replied, "no I can't remember the last time I saw kunt face," they then called the barmaids over and asked her if kunt face had been in recently. By that point I realised this was actually some old boys nick name lol, still cracks me up, only in the springbok.
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Best nicknames. on 19:49 - Jul 26 with 1385 viewshamptonhillhoop

Used to work with a bloke nicknamed 'Delia' as he made a meal out of everything you asked him to do.
Plus a female colleague known as the tortoise. Every time she was on her back she was f****d
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Best nicknames. on 20:40 - Jul 26 with 1367 viewsloftboy

Best nicknames. on 19:49 - Jul 26 by hamptonhillhoop

Used to work with a bloke nicknamed 'Delia' as he made a meal out of everything you asked him to do.
Plus a female colleague known as the tortoise. Every time she was on her back she was f****d


That just reminded me of a bird in Bracknell circa 1983, was at a fancy dress party when a bloke in a coppers outfit used his truncheon as a dido on her, from that day on she was known as truncheon, also another girl was known as smella Kunt which was a direct rhyme of her name, and she gave out more blow jobs one night than that bird in magaluf.
[Post edited 26 Jul 2014 20:50]

favourite cheese mature Cheddar. FFS there is no such thing as the EPL
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Best nicknames. on 21:28 - Jul 26 with 1350 viewsChinajohn

Was introduced to a young lady in South China called 'Three Holes' - enough said.......
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Best nicknames. on 01:49 - Jul 27 with 1318 viewsBluce_Ree

Two teachers at my school got unfortunate nicknames.

Miss Haralambous got Miss Hairy Love Puss.

Mr Cumaraswarmi got Mr Cum on my Sarnie.


Our mate 'all three of them'... His name was Neil McInnerny.

Oh and in college, Dave was universally known as Dave the Tw@t.

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Best nicknames. on 02:09 - Jul 27 with 1315 viewsPommyhoop

Bootsy. A fella at work who got ''too big for his boots'' after finishing his apprenticeship.

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Best nicknames. on 02:19 - Jul 27 with 1312 viewsozexile

Had a mate who didn't have a job for 3 years so we called him placebo. Cause he doesn't work.
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Best nicknames. on 23:04 - Jul 27 with 1252 viewsFearless

Mouseheart

Jay Bothroyd
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Best nicknames. on 00:23 - Jul 29 with 1187 viewsFredManRave

Many years ago I finally got my wish of being asked along to one of my older brothers days out to Brighton with him and a group of his mates. As the train pulled in to Three Bridges station they prepared to do their usual of opening the doors and jumping off the moving train onto the platform, so me being keen to impress the group, decided I'd go first for my first ever jump. With no fear and the train still doing a respectable jump off speed, I opened the door (as you could in those days) and did my virgin jump. Unfortunately nobody had told me and I embarrassingly wasn't aware that upon landing you had to literally hit the ground running so whilst the jump was impressive, on landing and planting both feet I preceded to fall arse over tit, look a complete knob infront of and much to the delight of everybody and from that moment on I was known as Action Man.
[Post edited 29 Jul 2014 0:27]

I've got the Power.
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