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The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular 09:29 - Oct 25 with 1932 viewsNorthernr

Presumably scheduled today so Wally and that lot fck off somewhere else, leaving only the Sky remedial to feed pre-prepared Gareth Bale questions to 'Arry. Anyway, LFW is live from a seedy Tokyo hotel room so whether the signal will be good enough for this we'll only know come 9.45 your time, 5.45 my time.... Updates to follow.

Here we go then, just the 14 mins late.

Big slurp of tea and a good morning. The congregation gathers.

Darmesh is on Sky remedial duties.

Team news. Blows out cheeks. Picked up a couple of injuries last week, Onuoha done a hamstring, he was playing excellent. Sandro done a groin. Waiting to see. Barton, Mutch etc still not fit.

Green is fit to play, Alex was excellent. Very lucky to have three good keepers. I have made a decision who'll start. Not telling you. (Rio Ferdinand walks past pulling on goalkeeper gloves)

POSTSCRIPT - Alex McCarthy told the press before 'Arry came in that he's looking forward to his first game under the lights at Loftus Road.

There was lots of positives last Sunday, excellent performance, couldn't 'ave asked for more, intensity of game top class. Got to build on that, 'ave to do it every week, no use having a one off game then going back to square one, 'ave to produce that performance again.

Always been positive. The big problem we've had is I bought some players in the summer and I can't get 'em on the pitch. Mutch, Sandro, Barton out for eight weeks etc etc yadda yadda key players unavailable. As positive as ever about it, still feel we'll be ok.

Whatever I'm doing someone asks if it's my best achievement, if we stay up it'll be fentastic, I'm sure we can. Long way to go, lots of points to play for, everybody very positive, sun is shining, grass is green, not a rapist, not a murderer, not a pedophile etc etc

We're at home. Good atmosphere on a Monday night. Crowd was great last week, place was jumping, we need that again, we need a performance like it again.

COMMENCE ADEL BELLY ASSESSMENT

No I don't regret calling Adel a fat bastrd, the fcking heifer wheezes when he sleeps for goodness sake.

I've been his biggest ally from six years ago at Tottenham, where I finished fourth two years running, I went there and he was banished training with the kids, I brought him back in. Nothing but on his side ever since that day, I'm the one person here who keeps sticking up for him, trying to get him to produce what he's capable of, get him fit enough. Something happened last week that disappointed me. Like him as a boy, lovely boy, fentastic talent, loves his mum, love him to be fit and playing. I told him to work hard in the reserves, I want you fit and in the team, we need him, I want him to go on a triffic, fentastic run and sticks two fingers up to me, I'd be delighted. Don't hold grudges. I always take players people say you love a problem player, the big difference is the ones I've had before keep producing on the pitch, Adel needs to produce, great talent, could be an incredible player for this club. Paolo Di Canio.

It's done we move on, apart from the stuff I'm abaght to say nagh obvs. He has to come in every day, train hard, get fit, get in the team. Nobody would be more pleased than me. I like him. I can talk football with him all day. Needs to start producing.

He's been ill all week. Sore throat. Hasn't trained all week. He's training this morning I fink. Haven't spoken to him. I've spoken to him a million times one on one, if he wants to do it he can get fit and if he does that his talent is fentastic, top top player.

I've had ups and downs with him before. I've been the one person, coaches here think I'm off my head for trying to get him onside and sticking wiv 'im, they'd have bombed 'im out ages ago but I love players with ability and talent, I want 'im to show what he can do. Two years since he produced the form he's capable ov 'ere.

Not in contention for Monday. 'asn't trained all week. 'ad a sore throat. When he joins in every day and works hard like everybody else, the quicker he does that the quicker I can get 'im in the team the better it will be for everybody.

Need 'im fit and playing. Can change a game with his talent. It's a shame. For his own good and good of QPR and the Queen Mum.

I speak to Tone every day. Great relationship. Spoke to him yesterday four times. Fentastic relationship. (Tony walks past in the background sharpening an axe)

Taarabt hasn't been punished, not that I know. Got pushed into writing a load ov stuff what aint true. I've been aght on that training pitch free or four times this week alone.

Unfair criticism of Rio. Very difficult, as a defender, we've been open as a team, the midfield players I brought in to build a barrier in front of the back four 'as been missing, no Sandro, Barton, Mutch (that's today's stock answer), Karl Henry done great, been delighted wiv him. Rio fentastic, out there every day working 'ard, he was jumping up and down in the dug out last week, nobody could be more with the team or a better pro, different class, shows all the other pros this is what you should do to in all those medals, 'e'll be first out there, up the front in all the running. That's what a fentastic pro looks like.

Fcking cnt now asking about Lamela's goal. 'Arry says he couldn't get his leg over these days. Everybody laughs. Jolly japes. Highly relevant stuff.

Dunney tried it once and fell over. Everybody laughing again. 'Arry wipes away a tear.

RECOMMENCE ADEL BELLY ASSESSMENT

People's Champion Wally Downes Jnr steps up asking 'Arry whether he regrest overshadowing the Liverpool positives with his attack on Adel.

I had the needle Wal with something that 'appened during the week. Maybe I just got the needle. When I get the 'ump I say what I fink.

He has tested me. He's tested everybody. I'm the one who has stuck with him. We went to Exeter a year ago, I came home for an op, left him with McClaren and he got sent home. I believe in 'im, I want 'im to do well, I'm bang on his side, when you're on his side so much and you get let daghn you crack over it. He's like a kid misbehaving, don't do that don't do that don't do that, then you get the 'ump with 'em. Finished now. I want to see 'im fit. AC Milan last year I was the first in 'ere saying did you see "'iim, he was fentastic last night," and everybody groaned and said 'he's going on about Adel again' but that's what I'm like.

None of the stuff he said was true. I'm first one out on that training ground every single day, collecting the petrol receipts from Bondy, asking Joe Jordan where he's put the red sauce. Every day. Anybody who says I'm not out there every day is lying. I'm in this ground 7.30 every morning. Everybody can bring their cameras any day of the week, when the players are out there I'm there. I think it's somebody telling him what to say. It's done and dusted, I want to be positive. The only person who can help Adel is himself. I love it when he does somfink special. I said to Glenn when he came in look at his ability, he said 'cor he can play' free days later he's asking why he won't train or play.

Tough league. Very very 'ard. Where are Villa meant to be? Lambert done a fentastic job. If they finish midway they'll be 'appy.

Roy Keane a fentastic football man. I've got Glenn Hoddle here he's a fentastic football man. It's about good players. Everybody's a fentastic football man.

Won't shake Roy Keane's hand before the end of the game.

And with that, Bondy strikes up, 'Arry climbs up onto the table - with assistance from Ian Taylor - seizes the microphone and bursts into song. Darmesh enthusiastic with the tambourine.




This post has been edited by an administrator
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The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 09:36 - Oct 25 with 1918 views18StoneOfHoop

Seedy tokyo hotel room you say?
We Need to know more!
6,000 words on sordid Japanese shenanigans by lunchtime please CW

You find geisha? Chat long time? Karaoke, saki, Sapporo and then leg-over in tight tiny oriental lovepurse last night perhaps?

Is there a pneumatic Scarlett Johansson lookalike in the room next door?

Stuff Harry and the same old cockerknee music hall act.. we really need to know more about what's occuring in the land of the rising sun - perhaps a film script

'A balding grumpy Englishman in Tokyo' or 'Clive Does Japan' ??
[Post edited 25 Oct 2014 9:43]

'I'm 18 with a bullet.Got my finger on the trigger,I'm gonna pull it.." Love,Peace and Fook Chelski! More like 20StoneOfHoop now. Let's face it I'm not getting any thinner. Pass the cake and pies please.

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The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 09:41 - Oct 25 with 1903 viewsNorthernr

The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 09:36 - Oct 25 by 18StoneOfHoop

Seedy tokyo hotel room you say?
We Need to know more!
6,000 words on sordid Japanese shenanigans by lunchtime please CW

You find geisha? Chat long time? Karaoke, saki, Sapporo and then leg-over in tight tiny oriental lovepurse last night perhaps?

Is there a pneumatic Scarlett Johansson lookalike in the room next door?

Stuff Harry and the same old cockerknee music hall act.. we really need to know more about what's occuring in the land of the rising sun - perhaps a film script

'A balding grumpy Englishman in Tokyo' or 'Clive Does Japan' ??
[Post edited 25 Oct 2014 9:43]


They send me here every year at this time. The fcking novelty soon wears off and once it does it's just a very crowded place full of mental people and sht food. Flying home tomorrow
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The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 09:54 - Oct 25 with 1853 views18StoneOfHoop

The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 09:41 - Oct 25 by Northernr

They send me here every year at this time. The fcking novelty soon wears off and once it does it's just a very crowded place full of mental people and sht food. Flying home tomorrow


'sht food' you barbaric northern troglodyte ?!!

Did you pack 6 tins of baked beans, 8 mars bars,3 family bags of cheese and onion crisps,4 pasties and some wrapped in newspaper fresh tripe in vinegar?

I wouldn't touch the raw fish on the conveyor belt - all that bacteria as Paulie Walnuts could tell you, would be asking for ironed-on desperate dashes to the electronic bog trots - but
one word for you
>>>>>>>> N ~ O ~ O ~ D ~ L ~ E ~ S !<<<<<<<<<
[Post edited 25 Oct 2014 9:59]

'I'm 18 with a bullet.Got my finger on the trigger,I'm gonna pull it.." Love,Peace and Fook Chelski! More like 20StoneOfHoop now. Let's face it I'm not getting any thinner. Pass the cake and pies please.

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The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 10:17 - Oct 25 with 1736 viewsconnell10

So what did old arry have to say? I just looked on but it had ended!

AND WHEN I DREAM , I DREAM ABOUT YOU AND WHEN I SCREAM I SCREAM ABOUT YOU!!!!!
Poll: best number 10 ever?

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The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 10:25 - Oct 25 with 1684 viewsMytch_QPR

Clive's our very own Bill Murray:



I trust you're not in one of those tube hotels (!!!???) - highly bizarre. Will you make it home in time for the Monday night showdown?

"Thank you for supporting Queens Park Rangers Steep Staircase"... and I thought I'd signed up for a rollercoaster.
Poll: Next temporary manager (the wheel of misfortune) - as requested by 18 Stone

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The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 10:33 - Oct 25 with 1625 viewsNorthernr

The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 10:25 - Oct 25 by Mytch_QPR

Clive's our very own Bill Murray:



I trust you're not in one of those tube hotels (!!!???) - highly bizarre. Will you make it home in time for the Monday night showdown?


Of course. Switched my flights around to go after Liverpool and be back before Villa. What do you take me for?

This post has been edited by an administrator
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The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 10:38 - Oct 25 with 1587 viewsMytch_QPR

The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 10:33 - Oct 25 by Northernr

Of course. Switched my flights around to go after Liverpool and be back before Villa. What do you take me for?

This post has been edited by an administrator


I knew that really. Don't forget to buy something pervy from one of the vending machines they have which cater for unhealthy schoolgirl-based fantasies...

Apparently.

"Thank you for supporting Queens Park Rangers Steep Staircase"... and I thought I'd signed up for a rollercoaster.
Poll: Next temporary manager (the wheel of misfortune) - as requested by 18 Stone

1
The Super Saturday Press Conference Brunch Spectacular on 11:11 - Oct 25 with 1460 viewsjohnhoop

By "seedy Tokyo hotel" room presumably you mean a room in one of the "Love Hotels" like they have here in Korea, complete with vibrating bed, porn on tap and your very own dildo vending machine ?
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