There was a time, seemingly many moons ago, where as a local derby approached, fans would be stepping up in line to declare their undying hatred for their opposition. You'd read quips about how people would set their alarm clocks for an hour earlier, just to hate their bitter rivals for another hour every day. We'd boycott the opposition's sponsors as it would somehow dripfeed its way through to their star striker's bar tab. And the away toilets would look like the victim of a dirty protest after the game.

Not these days. In these days of Premiership Super Sunday, face paint and curly wigs in which we live, it would appear that times have moved on, and now the rivalry elements have now been despatched to history along with Betamax videos, Trevor Francis tracksuits, Gary Neville razors and Maidstone United. The closest you get these days to rivalry is starting up a Facebook group which is more tinpot than Macclesfield's "Sign here if you're going to . . . . . "

Now never let it be said that we at RochdaleAFC.com are behind the times, so as a one off, we're propelling ourselves into this artificial 21st Century world of not giving a shit. And as such, we present to you our very first derby preview:

"Right this Saturday sees our big match against.... well I say big match, it's only a big match for our opposition. Whoever they might be. I am so above them, that I don't even know who they are. When that fixture list comes out, I immediately delete all the team names. All that matters to me is that we are playing.

For away games, I get picked up blindfolded at 9am and stuck in my mate's car boot, and only released a few seconds before 3pm. Admittedly that's a bit of a pain for evening kick offs, but why would I want to bother finding out if we are playing a team that I don't even recognise as a local rival? It was only when I happened to drive through the town by accident one week that I even realised that they were local to us.

I admit that for some of the younger fans, the sort who shake hands with the mascots, this may be a bigger than average game. But that's because they don't know any better. Should they be persecuted for their youth? Well probably yes, but it's not their fault that they don't remember our proper derbies against Newton Heath back in 1907-8.

They think that just because, us and Newton Heath have arguably gone on to different levels of success since then, but if you speak to any long time United fan, and they still rage at that Barlow goal that sent them bottom of the league back in 1908. They know, and a few years in different divisions has changed nothing as far as they're concerned.

So games against other teams, just fade into insignificance. Take this weekend's game for example. Saturday's hosts Bury have always been my second side. And if we can't win the game on Saturday, I can't think of any side I'd rather win the Bury v Dale game than Bury. I care so little about them that I actually like them.

Defeat will be met with a shrug of the shoulders at the start of the final whistle, and it will all have been forgotten about by the time that whistle has ended."

It's funny. All this effort by some to prove that it means this game means so little to them reminds me of that theory which states that the most homophobic people act in such a way to mask their own deeply hidden feelings of attraction to the same gender. You knows it, and anyone thinking otherwise is clearly a poof.

I'm quite happy to admit that this is a big game for me. I'm looking forward to the full day out. I can't wait to look out at Gigg Lane and see the Bury fans outnumbered by Dale fans (only cos it means more to us than them naturally). I can't wait to see the laughable away attendance figure given to mask their shame (whatever happened to that Stockport away following at Gigg?).

I like it when they lose. I like it that we can pick up players by them not considered to be good enough, and transform them into one of the best in the division in that position. (I defy anyone to say that they don't like TK more cos we picked him up for nothing from there!). I love it how you can hear them smashing up their monitors as we debate possible squad numbers for Nugent.

I think it's great that after putting up with them boasting about their fantastic youth policy for so long, we simply go out and sign up the coach responsible. Because we can do. I love their excuses about how their attendances are better than ours because we just happen to be doing better than they are.

Obviously, the game won't be up to much. You can count on the fingers of one hand the number of times there's been a game which has been anything other than your typical derby blood and guts, but I'm happy for that. Of course, I'd like nothing more than that to play them off the park with silky passing moves leading to a 7-0 victory, but I'd take just as much pleasure, if not more, by picking up a scruffy offside handballed goal, which came with our first attack of the game in the 98th minute.

Putting the derby elements of the game to one side, because after all, we've got a promotion to try and win, it's another potential three points. The Play Offs are in the bag, but there's still that every so small chance that we could sneak third place. The odds are against it for sure, but I've just got this sneaky feeling that come 5pm on Saturday, that every so remote chance of automatic will still be intact. Whether we can have the double Cockney victory to take it into the final game remains to be seen, but whilst it's a possibility, we're still fighting for it.

Of course, there's nothing that our hosts would like more than to be the ones to prevent us from making that top three by chucking a spanner in the works (you can use that one if you want Scoop!) on Saturday. How dreadful we'll feel as we match their songs of glee with songs of Wembley. Football Gods don't watch on derby day.

Anyway, what can we say about our opposition this weekend.. . .

You know, it's sometimes easier to know what's happening with a club as an outsider than it is to be one of that side's supporters.

Take Saturday's hosts, for example. Last Summer, they were all cock-a-hoop about their chances for this season. True, they'd made some decent signings during those Summer months, and a new gaffer at the club who could add that little bit of experience that their management team was lacking, and it seemed like they had all the vital ingredients, and were apparently on a financial high due to the Nugent money.

But, for those of us who have seen enough false dawns to celebrate a full centenary of them, we could tell early on that something just didn't fit right with our Shaking friends from 0161 country.

We read the interviews with Alexander. We read the comments from their board about how invaluable Alexander was going to be. We even read the delight from the Bury fans about attracting someone with a proven track record. The Phoenix was set to rise.

But something was afoot. Whilst everyone was vocally celebrating the long ball messiah, someone's comments on the new appointment was strangely absent. Their manager's. Casper's silence rang out far louder than those Walsh Out chants ever did. It was deafening.

Well a whole fourteen days into the Keith Alexander regime, we finally got to hear from Chris Casper about Alexander's arrival at Stade De Gigg. And what a happy scene those words painted as he told how as long as it was good for Bury FC, then there wouldn't be a problem. Them loveable Shakers took all those words at face value, and looked forward to living happily ever after. Bless their little cotton socks!

But it was clear things weren't right. Clear to us anyway. Casper's favoured 4-4-2 was now threatened by players who were clearly Alexander players used to Alexander's style of "football", and nobody really knew who was pulling the strings. Discontent? Did you ever see a picture of Alexander and Casper together? (Not that I'm suggesting they are the same person in a Clark Kent / Superman stylee).

Aye good signings were made, but the unease with the management duo was always going to overshadow the season, and we said as much in our pre-season preview.

And then came one of the funniest periods I've ever known at any football club ever. It was real Harchester United, pantomime stuff. You really couldn't make any of it up. As the defeats started to roll, we had Casper and Alexander both going into self-preservation mode, with arguments between the two raging in emergency meetings in a local pub, and across the back pages of the local rag. And finally the Bury supporters started to wake up and see what had been staring them in the face for months.

Told you so? Too right we did do, but hey, after years and years of successive freefalling, I guess they knew best.

Maybe that's the difference between the two sets of supporters. Take the recent shirt issue regarding next Saturday's game. Dale fans were most upset at the decision, and rightly said their piece on the matter. The club listened to the supporters, and everyone comes back down to Earth smiling in time to beat Morecambe on the Saturday.

Had that happened down the road, then anyone speaking out would immediately be labelled as some sort of fifth columnist, and amidst all sorts of threats to have the messageboard shut down, the dissenter would be publicly castigated, have the whole thing blamed on him, and like a set of subservient Baldricks, the issue is resolved with a "sign here if you love our directors" thread, where they all pledge their ownership to their dictatorial masters, and they all live happily ever after. As long as they've got a drum.

And just when things looked to be sorting themselves out, they go and get rid of the one man who they felt they could trust on the board, for that most heinous crime of wearing shorts. Shorts? He must have knees to have won many a rosette at Butlins or something for that crime. As we said, you couldn't make it up.

But the good ship Bury FC is now back on an even keel. The appointment of Knill has, aside from providing us with the obvious gags on his surname, given them a good run of form, and took them well away from the relegation dogfight that with their squad they shouldn't even be entertaining. Without wanting him to namedrop, I've met Alan Knill a few times, and he's a decent bloke and he comes with a good reputation from South Yorkshire and he'll do well for the Shakers.

But clearly, in a not caring about Dale sort of way, the Bury Directors had sat down after the KACC panto had ended and looked towards Dale for guidance and inspiration. What's successful? How do you appoint a manager who can lead you away from the drop and give hope for the following season?

How about go for someone who used to play in defence for you, with a surname rhyming with Will. David Gill and Lilo Lill were disappointed to only make the short list. And the Knill Revolution has begun.

The feelgood factor is most certainly buoyant at Gigg Lane at the moment, helped in no small way by five successive home wins for the Shakers, making a mockery of their 11-4 odds to win this game. Indeed, such is their good form, they've been able to attract an additional seventy supporters to this game in a bid to boost attendances that has been publicised both online and in their local paper. Perhaps that's what Hilly means by the cauldron!

So Saturday will see the day arrive, and we plough down en masse wearing our own tribute to their director in shorts. Can't wait! Gonna miss days like this next season!