For those that wondered what Brendon Rodgers got for his birthday back in January, the latest transfer rumours have answered the question.

Last summer Liverpool manager Brendon Rodgers had an epiphany, after failing to land the vacant manager's position at Southampton, he overheard a conversation in the pub which mentioned mountains and Mohammed, of course he got it completely wrong and decided that as he could not go to St Mary's then he must bring St Mary's to him.

Thus he embarked on a transfer policy that lead to much guffawing in the SO postcodes as well as ruining a perfectly good lunar eclipse for a nation after that penalty in Instanbul.

However even as Rodgers was laughed at across the land he was not worried, he had already started reading the book that he had received on his birthday on January 26th, sadly it came too late for this seasons second transfer window, but from just reading the title he knew that things would soon be cushty and he would once again be a legend in his own lunchtime.

That book was called "Its Not Rocket Science" or as we shall refer to it INRS.

It contained wonderful information that Brendon had forgotten as he was handed an almost unlimited budget, it talked of putting square pegs in round holes, something he had not considered in the summer of 2014, it also talked of playing players that complemented each other on the pitch.

This was something that Brendon had not got to grips with before, after all he had heard with his own ears Martin Skrtel congratulate Dejan Lovren at Anfield six months earlier on his winning goal and performance, with spelling not being his greatest attribute Brendon had not realised that "Complement" and "Compliment" were two different words with two different meanings.

So when his transfer committee had told him to go and get a player that would complement Skrtel's playing style, after checking his dictionary he got it completely wrong, OK well not completely as Dejan Lovren often tells Skrtel that he looks good or that his car is nice, so not all the money has been wasted, but of course the supporters don't see what happens at the training ground.

However Brendon has now learn't from his mistakes and armed with his new book he now feels able to dip his toes back into the transfer market and he has realised if Liverpool are not to keep on giving away soft goals then he cannot play two central defenders in his defence who share exactly the same attributes, ie no positional sense, the turning circle of the Titanic and an inability to pass to another member of their own side at a distance of over 5 metres.

Now football fans are now seeing the new Brendon Rodgers as for the first time ever he is linked with signing a player that is not entirely the same as someone else he has in the side and that player is Southampton's Jose Fonte.

Fonte who will be 23 in December after a cunning ploy by Saints who changed his age with a slight about turn in numbers on his website profile to tempt Rodgers, is just the sort of player that Brendon wants and Saints are just the club to take a large sum of dosh off of Brendon's hands, they have the experience and they have the capacity not only in the enlarged Liverpool section of the St Mary's bank vault, but enough needle and thread to sew up the sides of 32,000 Saints fans.

So St Mary's is braced for the bid from Liverpool for Fonte and indeed will welcome it and Ronald Koeman has already bought a couple of books himself to help with the negotiations, the first is called "Sweets from a baby" and the second "A fool and his money is easily parted"

Photo: Action Images

halftimeorange added 12:25 - May 14 Mock all you want but Liverpool will buy success and I'm sure that those who haven't delivered for them this season will be shown the door. If they want Fonte they'll probably get him and any number of others BR perceives will get them into next season's top four. I wouldn't put it past them to bid for Alderwereld.
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BoondockSaint added 14:22 - May 14 They have money, but not bottomless pockets like Chelsky or Citihad. I doubt they even sell as many shirts as ManU. Their owners are having enough trouble throwing away money on the non-performing Red Saux. So I think Brenda gets one more window to bring in proper talent or he's out. But he will have drained their resources.
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dirk_doone added 18:07 - May 14 Fonte is the backbone of our team and we would miss him more than any other player. No amount of money would make it worth selling him to a rival team.
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SaintNick added 18:20 - May 14 Given that he has been responsible in some way for 4 of the last 6 goals we have conceded perhaps its time we did sell him. For the record I feel he was at fault for 1. First goal against Spurs let the player get in front of him (MOTD pundits agreed with me) 2. Penalty against Sunderland with wild kick out 3. First goal against Leicester, didnt shut down shooter and ball went between legs, he really should of done better. 4. Second goal against Leicester, ball watched and went over to winger when Alderweireld had already done so leaving his man unmarked to score Sorry but Fonte has let himself down in recent weeks after a good season

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BoondockSaint added 19:17 - May 14 Unfortunately I could only vote once in agreement with dirk doone. As far as I am concerned, Fonte is heart and soul of the club. Yes he made some errors in recent games, but it's not like the rest of the team were playing their hearts out in front of him! Gee, Nick I don't remember you listing every single foul-up Shane Long has made-was it in an earlier post that I missed? Could you provide the link?

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corkcitysaint added 20:19 - May 14 Could he not take Gardos instead..??
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SaintNick added 08:55 - May 15 Boondock Yes Fonte is the heart and sould of the club, but that does not absolve him from blame, he has made too many errors of late and the fact that those in front of him arent playing well is no excuse, he is the captain he needs to lead by example, over a season that number of errors is just about acceptable, but in essentially the last three games something is wrong I take your point about Shane Long, but the problem is strikers will always miss chances, defenders and goalkeepers errors are easier to pinpoint if they result in goals, sadly that is football a striker can be crap for 89 minutes and then score a last minute winner and will be a hero and has done his job. A defender can be brilliant for 89 minutes but make one mistake and it that results in a one goal defeat then he hasnt done his job.

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BoondockSaint added 13:37 - May 15 Right you are, Nick, but you are always on about not scapegoating individual players and then when you do it, it's Fonte of all people? For me, he would be so far back in the "No Earning His Pay" line of I would put Nash & St. Louis of NY Rangers ahead of him!! (Sorry, off topic-don't get me started!)
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SaintNick added 14:05 - May 15 I am against people abusing players at the ground in person, I have always maintained that the place to discuss it is on message boards and threads like this or down the pub. Tomorrow i shall be firmly behind Jose Fonte and willing him on to recapture his form, I highlighted his recent lack of form due to the fact that the likes of S Davis and Gazzaniga got the brunt of the blame against Leicester whereas Fonte is seen as unblameable at present. That is the culture we have sadly certain players get blamed for every little thing whereas some are not

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dirk_doone added 10:12 - May 16 Nick's long-term prejudice against our Player of the Season, and one of the best central defenders in Europe, is farcical, especially when he criticized people for having similar prejudices against one of his favourites, Danny Fox.
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SaintBrock added 15:30 - May 17 Gets a bit tiring Nick, stick to the straight stuff mate comedy is not your greatest ability.
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