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A stand up shite 18:08 - Dec 14 with 3250 viewsHighjack

Anyone ever do this from time to time? You get a great sense of achievement if you can get it in the bowl from a great distance. My record is 27 feet.

The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.
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A stand up shite on 18:09 - Dec 14 with 3241 viewsNeiltheTaylor

Does leaning against a tree or shovel count?

Joe_bradshaw -I thought the cryochamber was the new name for Cardiff's stadium.

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A stand up shite on 18:11 - Dec 14 with 3232 viewsJackistentialist

I once saw 3/4 of the Swans board do it from the top of the West Stand on the supporters below.
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A stand up shite on 00:00 - Dec 15 with 3136 viewsLoyal

These are the topics that often go overlooked on Internet forums.
I'm all for this for numerous reasons. The first is that as we know we all have different types of dumpage. Sometimes they fly out like a smooth twix almost inviting a second tasting, others are more nobbly and if you are processing a day's food intake quite a pan filler. The ones that suit the standing up dump the best are those pellet like dumps, the small ballbearing type chaps that can number up to twelve on a good day. You can almost tell these little lads are coming.

My suggestion when standing up is to part your legs and crouch forward looking backawards back through your legs as here at diagram 1



From here take a small spade ( like the ones the kids take on the beach ) and wack each pellet as it drops down. Now, the trajectory here can be amazing. After a while you can wack a few over a neighbours fence, annoy the dog when it's sleeping, even have a laugh with the mrs when there's nothing on the tele. The options are endless.

Either way I am a great advocate of the stand up shit, never of course after a night out and a sneaky vindaloo but yes, after a day on carbs and little water intake and the fun can last all day.

PS - please don't get your spouse or partner to open their mouths for this, it makes the whole concept tasteless.

Excellent thread 👍

Nolan sympathiser, clout expert, personal friend of Leigh Dineen, advocate and enforcer of porridge swallows. The official inventor of the tit w@nk.
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A stand up shite on 00:05 - Dec 15 with 3128 viewstaffpop

A stand up shite on 00:00 - Dec 15 by Loyal

These are the topics that often go overlooked on Internet forums.
I'm all for this for numerous reasons. The first is that as we know we all have different types of dumpage. Sometimes they fly out like a smooth twix almost inviting a second tasting, others are more nobbly and if you are processing a day's food intake quite a pan filler. The ones that suit the standing up dump the best are those pellet like dumps, the small ballbearing type chaps that can number up to twelve on a good day. You can almost tell these little lads are coming.

My suggestion when standing up is to part your legs and crouch forward looking backawards back through your legs as here at diagram 1



From here take a small spade ( like the ones the kids take on the beach ) and wack each pellet as it drops down. Now, the trajectory here can be amazing. After a while you can wack a few over a neighbours fence, annoy the dog when it's sleeping, even have a laugh with the mrs when there's nothing on the tele. The options are endless.

Either way I am a great advocate of the stand up shit, never of course after a night out and a sneaky vindaloo but yes, after a day on carbs and little water intake and the fun can last all day.

PS - please don't get your spouse or partner to open their mouths for this, it makes the whole concept tasteless.

Excellent thread 👍


I'm learning so much my head hurts. I can't wait to try some of these suggestions. I might load up on weetabix and take tomorrow off.
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A stand up shite on 00:12 - Dec 15 with 3118 viewsLoyal

A stand up shite on 00:05 - Dec 15 by taffpop

I'm learning so much my head hurts. I can't wait to try some of these suggestions. I might load up on weetabix and take tomorrow off.


Careful on the weetabix, my reckoning, albeit unqualified on cereal type dumping is you could easily jettison an odour not disilmar to your old grans knickers after three days wear on a hot summers holiday. This in turn could cause you to be alienated by those you hold dearest as the odour can cause boffage and a double migration of fluids and body litter from anus and mouth.

To see that happen whilst crouching down looking backwards between your legs with a child's spade In your hand will take a little explaination. Mind you if your family love you they will in time let it go.

If you get my drift. But be warned these seemingly harmless forays in to the alternative can cause alarm and distress if not carefully managed.

Nolan sympathiser, clout expert, personal friend of Leigh Dineen, advocate and enforcer of porridge swallows. The official inventor of the tit w@nk.
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A stand up shite on 00:52 - Dec 15 with 3097 viewstaffpop

A stand up shite on 00:12 - Dec 15 by Loyal

Careful on the weetabix, my reckoning, albeit unqualified on cereal type dumping is you could easily jettison an odour not disilmar to your old grans knickers after three days wear on a hot summers holiday. This in turn could cause you to be alienated by those you hold dearest as the odour can cause boffage and a double migration of fluids and body litter from anus and mouth.

To see that happen whilst crouching down looking backwards between your legs with a child's spade In your hand will take a little explaination. Mind you if your family love you they will in time let it go.

If you get my drift. But be warned these seemingly harmless forays in to the alternative can cause alarm and distress if not carefully managed.


I appreciate your counsel. Maybe a dozen egg omlette to start off - see how I go. Not got a childs shovel but there's a floppy Ikea spatula here somewhere.

Happy holidays!
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A stand up shite on 07:56 - Dec 15 with 3034 viewsmonmouth

There was a massive shite standing up on our left wing last night.

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A stand up shite on 14:34 - Dec 15 with 2949 viewsswanjackal

I have witnessed a fellow jack in Yates in Cardiff, call for his mates to surround him , to enshroud him, as he squatted slightly with his jeans round his ankles and take a shite in the middle of the pub.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hypocritically hypocritical !

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A stand up shite on 14:37 - Dec 15 with 2947 viewstaffpop

A stand up shite on 14:34 - Dec 15 by swanjackal

I have witnessed a fellow jack in Yates in Cardiff, call for his mates to surround him , to enshroud him, as he squatted slightly with his jeans round his ankles and take a shite in the middle of the pub.


Classy
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A stand up shite on 14:58 - Dec 15 with 2939 viewsSoberBaker

A stand up shite on 14:34 - Dec 15 by swanjackal

I have witnessed a fellow jack in Yates in Cardiff, call for his mates to surround him , to enshroud him, as he squatted slightly with his jeans round his ankles and take a shite in the middle of the pub.


Is he related to GG Allin?

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=18a89ed358

AMOW

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A stand up shite on 15:43 - Dec 15 with 2909 viewsjojaca

A stand up shite on 14:58 - Dec 15 by SoberBaker

Is he related to GG Allin?

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=18a89ed358


I was not expecting that.

Even when you know, you never know?

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A stand up shite on 16:50 - Dec 15 with 2867 viewsSoberBaker

A stand up shite on 15:43 - Dec 15 by jojaca

I was not expecting that.




Enjoy your gravy dinner tonight, mate

AMOW

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A stand up shite on 19:03 - Dec 15 with 2821 viewsskippyjack

A stand up shite on 00:00 - Dec 15 by Loyal

These are the topics that often go overlooked on Internet forums.
I'm all for this for numerous reasons. The first is that as we know we all have different types of dumpage. Sometimes they fly out like a smooth twix almost inviting a second tasting, others are more nobbly and if you are processing a day's food intake quite a pan filler. The ones that suit the standing up dump the best are those pellet like dumps, the small ballbearing type chaps that can number up to twelve on a good day. You can almost tell these little lads are coming.

My suggestion when standing up is to part your legs and crouch forward looking backawards back through your legs as here at diagram 1



From here take a small spade ( like the ones the kids take on the beach ) and wack each pellet as it drops down. Now, the trajectory here can be amazing. After a while you can wack a few over a neighbours fence, annoy the dog when it's sleeping, even have a laugh with the mrs when there's nothing on the tele. The options are endless.

Either way I am a great advocate of the stand up shit, never of course after a night out and a sneaky vindaloo but yes, after a day on carbs and little water intake and the fun can last all day.

PS - please don't get your spouse or partner to open their mouths for this, it makes the whole concept tasteless.

Excellent thread 👍


This is why your wives refer me as GOD.

The awkward moment when a Welsh Club become the Champions of England.. shh The Swansea Way.. To upset the odds.
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A stand up shite on 19:51 - Dec 15 with 2796 viewsjojaca

A stand up shite on 16:50 - Dec 15 by SoberBaker



Enjoy your gravy dinner tonight, mate


Never heard of GG Allin until today, I have had good laugh at some of his youtube videos.

Even when you know, you never know?

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A stand up shite on 21:21 - Dec 15 with 2759 viewsLoyal

A stand up shite on 14:58 - Dec 15 by SoberBaker

Is he related to GG Allin?

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=18a89ed358


Class act pal. 👍

Nolan sympathiser, clout expert, personal friend of Leigh Dineen, advocate and enforcer of porridge swallows. The official inventor of the tit w@nk.
Poll: Who should be Swansea number 1

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A stand up shite on 22:45 - Dec 15 with 2721 viewsSwanjack10

A stand up shite on 00:00 - Dec 15 by Loyal

These are the topics that often go overlooked on Internet forums.
I'm all for this for numerous reasons. The first is that as we know we all have different types of dumpage. Sometimes they fly out like a smooth twix almost inviting a second tasting, others are more nobbly and if you are processing a day's food intake quite a pan filler. The ones that suit the standing up dump the best are those pellet like dumps, the small ballbearing type chaps that can number up to twelve on a good day. You can almost tell these little lads are coming.

My suggestion when standing up is to part your legs and crouch forward looking backawards back through your legs as here at diagram 1



From here take a small spade ( like the ones the kids take on the beach ) and wack each pellet as it drops down. Now, the trajectory here can be amazing. After a while you can wack a few over a neighbours fence, annoy the dog when it's sleeping, even have a laugh with the mrs when there's nothing on the tele. The options are endless.

Either way I am a great advocate of the stand up shit, never of course after a night out and a sneaky vindaloo but yes, after a day on carbs and little water intake and the fun can last all day.

PS - please don't get your spouse or partner to open their mouths for this, it makes the whole concept tasteless.

Excellent thread 👍


I eat nothing but protien for this shyte game,i thrust my hard pellets bending over at the top of the stairs watching my dog catching the lil brown bullets in his teeth.

ambition is critical....................
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