As the news sinks in that Joey Barton will be banned for the first 12 matches of next season, Jesse Whittock wonders if it was just him that noticed Carlos Tevez started the whole thing in the first place.
Before I start, let me make this very clear: this is not a defence of Joey Barton. I repeat, not a defence. His completely mentile actions at the Etihad cast a dark shadow over what was otherwise one of the brightest days in recent Rangers' history. And head-butting Vincent Kompany? Have you seen the size of him? Mental.
So, again, not a defence. Barton is a grade-A fruit-loop but this is about FA hypocrisy.
To the letter of the law, the FA could well have made a mistake giving our beloved captain a 12-game ban. It should have been 15. As he'd already got a red against Norwich (unjustified though it was), the initial red for striking Carlos Tevez equates to an automatic four-game ban. Fair enough. The second and third incidents were counted as separate offences of violent conduct, and Barton's lucky they weren't judged on an ascending scale i.e. 3+2 for the Aguero kick and 3+3 for the Kompany one.
The additional £75,000 fine was seemingly cooked up in that bizarre alternate universe that the FA disciplinary committee seems to inhabit, where they sit around drinking whisky and gleefully spinning the Wheel of Bullshit to see what they can conjure up next.
Barton was actually lucky if taken on that basis but the forensic analysis tells a different story. The fact that Tevez struck Barton and started the fracas – much like Bradley Johnson did at Loftus Road in December – has been completely ignored by the authorities and the press. This is despite the FA having power to act retrospectively, as the ref had missed that part of the incident from his match report.
Tevez is gurning chump at the best of times and, for a man who looks like he eats granite for breakfast, he went down quicker than Tulisa in that dodgy phone video. Barton's reputation preceded him and was clearly taken into account, which is illegal in both national and Football Association law.
Then there's this from the FA: "There are rules of conduct that should be adhered to, and such behavior tarnishes the image of football in this country, particularly as this match was the pinnacle of the domestic season and watched by millions around the globe." Quite why the magnitude of a football match has a on the length of a ban I don't know, but if we apply that logic Eric Cantona's eight-month ban for the Crystal Palace kung-fu kick in 1995 should have just been a quick hairdryer dressing down from Alex Ferguson and a one-match ban.
Perhaps this is why Bradford and Crawley players were allowed to beat seven shades of shit out of each other two months ago with little recourse. Bradford's top-ranked slugger and former R’s loanee Andrew Davies was suspended for just five matches, despite walloping pretty much everything in a football kit within five yards of him during that debacle. The principle seems to be that if you're going for assault on the pitch, make sure you're playing in a match the FA deems irrelevant and unworthy of interest.
Or you should be Wayne Rooney, whom the FA defended staunchly when he kicked a Montenegrin defender in the leg for no reason other than he was apparently bored by that entirely crap Euro qualifying game last year. Not only that but they actively campaigned for and won a one-match reprieve from UEFA, allowing the Shrektacular forward to play in the final European Championship group game against Ukraine. Classy.
So, perhaps the principle is actually lower league games or incidents that could negatively affect England's performance and by extension the FA's bragging rights the next time it heads to Geneva for a jolly with FIFA. If so, let's hope Joleon Lescott sends Franck Ribery seven feet in the air on 11 June. The FA says you can, Joleon, so shunt away with our blessing…
Meanwhile, the media witch-hunt is on. Patrick Barclay (who very clearly and bizarrely showed his prejudice against QPR by wishing us relegation in the Evening Standard because Fabrice Muamba had a heart attack), Mark Saggers from Talksport, the redtops, and numerous other news outlets are demanding we give Barton the heave-ho. Talksport even bizarrely suggested he take the footballers' equivalent to a gap year before coming back refreshed and to open arms in 2013/14. They should leave our management and board to work this out alone.
So much of the dialogue is all reactionary and ludicrous, mainly for two reasons.
Firstly, sacking someone as volatile as Joey Barton would mean a long, drawn-out legal battle with his expensive lawyers, and the last place QPR need to be after the last few years is back in court. The Ali Faurlin case was enough drama to last a lifetime, and I don't imagine a verdict in our favour would give the same feeling of vindication as we felt before the Leeds game last season.
Secondly, this is about context. Five years ago in 2006/7, we had players like Steve Lomas and Nick Ward shepherding (sabotaging) our midfield. Five years before that we were eighth in the Division 2 and had nearly merged with Wimbledon just 12 months before.
I don't know about you, but I don't want to see the likes of Nick Ward in the blue-and-white shirt or experience merger rumours ever again. Barton, for all his poor performances and gobshite tweeting, is a better caliber of player than we've been accustomed too for a long time, and while Talksport might even be right that he deserves to be sent somewhere far, far away where he can do no damage, I'm more interested in QPR keeping Premiership quality players and remaining a top-tier team. Call me cynical, but his driving performances in the final home games of the season after his Liverpool disaster cannot be downplayed. Unless we sign a better replacement, he should stay and play a role – though certainly not as captain, and not necessarily first team.
If nothing else, we've been through worse than Joey Barton's thuggery, and QPR's biggest nuisance isn't at home, anyway. It's that circus act down at Wembley and the shit-stirring hacks we need to rally against.
Jesse Whittock is a journalist based in West London. He also makes up the other half of the QPR' contingent on the news desk where Clive plies his trade. Follow him on Twitter @twhittock
Pictures – Action Images