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The man with no eyebrows...the final chapter...The Damned United revisited

It was certainly a case of being off the Leeds United Gravy Train following our defeat to Derby County on Bank Holiday Easter Monday.

Derby did us 2-1, after the match a grim faced David Haigh was waiting in the tunnel "We need to talk Neil", I could see what was coming.

I stalled him and looked up Clough junior, who was cavorting with his players in the away dressing room. I knew Nige from my Notts County days and said to him "Nige, I think the buggers are about to sack me, in that film about your Dad exactly what did he say? Sommat like it will cost you 25 grand?"

Nigel shrugged "F**k knows Neil, never watched it mate, mum disapproved of the book so there was no chance of seeing the film"

I knew this was a lie because two seasons earlier, Clough made his players walk the last couple of hundred yards to the stadium like in the movie.

Haigh was still waiting for me in the tunnel, again I stalled him cos Yorkshire Radio were waiting for me too and that was Bates's baby so I told Eddie Gray they should look at appointing Redfearn to see if the t**t could do a better job than me! Well I didn't exactly say that but the sentiment was there!

I thought I'd save Mark Hughes name for the papers, me bitter? Ha ha!

Sure enough Haigh announced it was all over. Luckily Sharon was up in Leeds for Easter, so she loaded most of my stuff into her car. I did another quick interview with Sky, said my goodbyes (well to Browny and Paddy at least) and returned for one last look at the cottage that had been my home for a year.

I noticed there were sixteen boxes of gravy granules in the pantry. These came as part of my kit sponsorship deal, one box per month. Luckily I had the good sense to insist the sponsor deliver up front as Sharon and I were planning an event "Sunday Dinner with Neil Warnock" where for just £45 fans could enjoy a Sunday roast and all the trimmings in our barn and meet me as part of the deal.

I thought nothing of it as I loaded them into my Jag before making the long journey south-west.

Three-days later, I was out looking for a new tractor with William to buy with my severance pay when my mobile phone rang. It was Bates. The kit sponsor had gone ape-shit cos they reckoned I owed them back two boxes of gravy as I had not completed my full term as manager.

I got my solicitors to write a letter to Haigh. However that summed up their pettiness and in the end I sent them a cheque for £12.18 to cover the cost of the gravy granules they said were not mine.

My time at Leeds was anything but a ride on the gravy train!

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