| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 11:05 - Jan 30 with 2930 views | Ranger78 |
Seems like a good, brave man. Fair play to him.
Having sadly been through the same thing myself, I can empathise a lot with him and echo his thoughts on his fiancé. To see how my wife has dealt with it is truly amazing.
Happily, almost 9 years on, life is great and we're blessed with two beautiful boys. Hopefully he'll find himself in the same place in the future |  | |  |
| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 12:32 - Jan 30 with 2831 views | terryb |
| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 11:05 - Jan 30 by Ranger78 |
Seems like a good, brave man. Fair play to him.
Having sadly been through the same thing myself, I can empathise a lot with him and echo his thoughts on his fiancé. To see how my wife has dealt with it is truly amazing.
Happily, almost 9 years on, life is great and we're blessed with two beautiful boys. Hopefully he'll find himself in the same place in the future |
I've not read the article yet, but felt that I had to reply to Ranger78.
I'm so pleased to see that you have coped with such a tradegy & have a wonderful family.
Three children & a wife that you will love forever! |  | | |
| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 12:46 - Jan 30 with 2801 views | terryb |
I've now read the article.
Harry Arter, I liked you as a player, but my respect for you as a person is now immense.
I hope that Rachael & yourself will go on to have other children thatyou will love as much as Rennee. | | | |
| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 13:48 - Jan 30 with 2708 views | Pommyhoop |
I still remember the exact moment the nurse looking at the scan furrowed her brow and adjusted the mouse and furrowed her brow again and then said hold on I've just got to get the doctor ,I wont be long. The doctor came in and confirmed that our baby had hydrocephalus and because I had an Irish Catholic name he gave us a lot of attention and basically told us of a bleak future. They let us go home to think about it for a full day but we had decided before we had got in the cab.
It wasn't like an abortion tho . She was 5 an a half months gone so they had to give her tablets to basically kill it and have her give birth to it. I say it because we both agreed we didn't want to know the sex of the baby. When it was happening and the baby was coming out she was holding on to my head as strong as any MMA choke hold. And the nurses behind us were saying what a beautiful baby etc and are we sure we didn't want to know. I just honored her wishes and buried my face into her neck.
She had a miscarriage about a year after that and not long after that we split up and divorced. I was lucky and met my perfect girl fairly quick .She already had a 2 year old but I rode out the piss taking and my own doubts and fears and stuck it out.
Now the 2 year old is 23 and we have an 18 year old girl and a 14 year old boy..
Although I am happy as larry and blessed to have the family I have .I sometimes think of the time I had for my first wife and a feeling of loss for our baby . Don't get me wrong we would not have lasted but the love was there . Maybe too much.He was a boy . I'm sure he was [Post edited 30 Jan 2016 14:03]
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| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 14:48 - Jan 30 with 2633 views | paulparker |
Wow
Respect to you pom & Ranger78
We lost our lad Eion just over 6 years ago to stillbirth
We hadn't long been together and it's a real test of any partnership in getting through it
Mrs P had some very dark days , still does , we never tried again as the pain was to much
We are still blessed as we have a beautiful daughter and the 3 of us are tight as an Arsenal back four |  |
| And Bowles is onside, Swinburne has come rushing out of his goal , what can Bowles do here , onto the left foot no, on to the right foot
That’s there that’s two, and that’s Bowles
Brian Moore
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| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 14:59 - Jan 30 with 2616 views | terryb |
I'm in awe of the three of you.
Thank God, I've not had to suffer this & can't imagine how you coped.
It took me nearly fifty years to come to terms with losing my sister in a car accident aged 17. I doubt that my mind would have let me to get through what Harry Arter & yourselves have suffered. | | | |
| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 21:04 - Jan 30 with 2474 views | dixiedean |
Respect to you all. These stories put our trivial day to day woes into perspective | | | |
| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 21:28 - Jan 30 with 2437 views | bosh67 |
| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 21:04 - Jan 30 by dixiedean |
Respect to you all. These stories put our trivial day to day woes into perspective |
Indeed. Total respect to Harry Arter, his wife and anyone who has been through such a tragedy. |  |
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| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 21:58 - Jan 30 with 2411 views | yankeephil |
Very moving story Pommy. Life does go on & you seemed blessed with a wonderful family, but you never forget the child you lost. | | | |
| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 22:56 - Jan 30 with 2364 views | E17hoop |
| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 13:48 - Jan 30 by Pommyhoop |
I still remember the exact moment the nurse looking at the scan furrowed her brow and adjusted the mouse and furrowed her brow again and then said hold on I've just got to get the doctor ,I wont be long. The doctor came in and confirmed that our baby had hydrocephalus and because I had an Irish Catholic name he gave us a lot of attention and basically told us of a bleak future. They let us go home to think about it for a full day but we had decided before we had got in the cab.
It wasn't like an abortion tho . She was 5 an a half months gone so they had to give her tablets to basically kill it and have her give birth to it. I say it because we both agreed we didn't want to know the sex of the baby. When it was happening and the baby was coming out she was holding on to my head as strong as any MMA choke hold. And the nurses behind us were saying what a beautiful baby etc and are we sure we didn't want to know. I just honored her wishes and buried my face into her neck.
She had a miscarriage about a year after that and not long after that we split up and divorced. I was lucky and met my perfect girl fairly quick .She already had a 2 year old but I rode out the piss taking and my own doubts and fears and stuck it out.
Now the 2 year old is 23 and we have an 18 year old girl and a 14 year old boy..
Although I am happy as larry and blessed to have the family I have .I sometimes think of the time I had for my first wife and a feeling of loss for our baby . Don't get me wrong we would not have lasted but the love was there . Maybe too much.He was a boy . I'm sure he was [Post edited 30 Jan 2016 14:03]
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The hospital didn't manage it anywhere as well as that in our circumstances; we found out at a 20 week scan that he'd died and my wife had to carry him for 2 days before the hospital put her into a forced labour so he could be born. Hardest 2 days of our lives; nothing but the utmost respect for Arter.
It does get easier over time and I've 2 healthy boys aged 15 and 20 but I'll never forget my other son. |  |
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| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 23:09 - Jan 30 with 2345 views | SydneyRs |
| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 13:48 - Jan 30 by Pommyhoop |
I still remember the exact moment the nurse looking at the scan furrowed her brow and adjusted the mouse and furrowed her brow again and then said hold on I've just got to get the doctor ,I wont be long. The doctor came in and confirmed that our baby had hydrocephalus and because I had an Irish Catholic name he gave us a lot of attention and basically told us of a bleak future. They let us go home to think about it for a full day but we had decided before we had got in the cab.
It wasn't like an abortion tho . She was 5 an a half months gone so they had to give her tablets to basically kill it and have her give birth to it. I say it because we both agreed we didn't want to know the sex of the baby. When it was happening and the baby was coming out she was holding on to my head as strong as any MMA choke hold. And the nurses behind us were saying what a beautiful baby etc and are we sure we didn't want to know. I just honored her wishes and buried my face into her neck.
She had a miscarriage about a year after that and not long after that we split up and divorced. I was lucky and met my perfect girl fairly quick .She already had a 2 year old but I rode out the piss taking and my own doubts and fears and stuck it out.
Now the 2 year old is 23 and we have an 18 year old girl and a 14 year old boy..
Although I am happy as larry and blessed to have the family I have .I sometimes think of the time I had for my first wife and a feeling of loss for our baby . Don't get me wrong we would not have lasted but the love was there . Maybe too much.He was a boy . I'm sure he was [Post edited 30 Jan 2016 14:03]
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That's remarkably similar to what me and my wife went through. A dreadful experience, particularly for her as she had to endure the physical experience of giving birth knowing there was nothing at the end of it. There were also several miscarriages but we now have two lovely kids aged 12 and 9. After our son was born I booked straight in for a vasectomy. We couldn't face the stress of going through another pregnancy and the fears of what might happen. It very nearly broke the Mrs, but we survived and are stronger for it. | | | |
| (No subject) (n/t) on 01:00 - Jan 31 with 2271 views | Benny_the_Ball |
Both tragic and inspirational; puts football well and truly into perspective. I have massive respect for the strength and courage you all display in the face of such deep tragedy. [Post edited 31 Jan 2016 1:01]
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| Harry Arter: ‘Every single game now I go out to play for her on 14:52 - Jan 31 with 2106 views | denhamhoop2 |
Reading this brought tears to my eyes and liked the fact his teammates and wives were thoughtful enough to go round and help remove the nursery.How women give birth to their dead baby just astounds me.Where do they get that sort of strength from I know I just wouldn't be able to do so.Hope that all those who have been through this sort of tragedy are able to find joy later on.
Makes me even more want Bournemouth to survive in the top flight | | | |
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