It doesn't take much to sent the tabloid press into a frenzy, here we reveal several alleged facts that even one of which would lead to a back page exclusive a back page exclusive for the likes of the Daily Mail's Neil Ashton.

The tabloid press doesn't need much prompting to write a story about how one of our players or even three or four are at the very moment you are reading the story, locked in talks with one club or another, even when that club may not even have a manager.

Here after painstaking research we have uncovered several "facts" that confirm that Adam Lallana is off to Liverpool, one of these facts on its own would be worthy of a back page exclusive in the Daily Mail, two or three of them together would mean a two page inside cover story, but put together and they are dynamite, if they were to fall into the hands of the chief rumour spreaders in the tabloid press it would undoubtably be a colour supplement in the Mail On Sunday or such like.

The eveidence that Adam is off to Liverpool is out there, when you find it you can's argue with it.

1. A mole in the Saints dressing room has revealed that after the Olympic Opening Ceremony in 2012 Adam couldn't stop singing Hey Jude in the shower for days afterwards, when you realise that the singer was Paul McCartney then the evidence is clear.

2. A passer by saw Adam looking in an estate agents window in Bournemouth last week, when asked where he was moving to, Adam probably replied he was "off to live near Poole" however there was a lot of traffic noise and he might have said something that sounded similar.

3. Adam is friends with Lee Barnard who according to a popular song is short and f***** hard, uncannily Liverpool's Steve Gerrard also shares the same stature and his name rhymes as well, although to our knowledge Lee hasn't yet been put on his rear end by Demba Ba just yet.

4. Several years ago Adam borrowed a copy of Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band from Bradley Wright Phillips, he has yet to return it and is now believed to be infactuated with the Beatles

5. On another musical note, Adam's surname Lallana was the original name of Liverpool beat combo The La's who shortened it so it would save costs on printing cd covers, their hit single was called There She Goes and featured in the football film Fever Pitch which itself was based on a game played at Anfield between Liverpool and Arsenal exactly two weeks and two days after Adam's 1st Birthday Party.

6. Adam wears number 20 for Saints, the number 20 bus in Liverpool runs from the City Centre to Kirby, stopping at the end of Everton Valley less than a mile from Anfield, this would be the bus Adam would get to the ground from Lime Street Station if he goes by train for transfer talks.

7. It is rumoured that Saints change to an all red kit was not after all the work of dastardly Nicola Cortese (who incidentally would have gotten away with it as well if it hadn't been for you meddling Kat's) but at the insistence of Adam who wanted to get used to playing in all red for a couple of seasons before playing for a team who are actually famous for wearing that kit.

8. Adam Lallana despite being a footballing god from a young age still had to go to school, at the schools he attended there was probably a good chance there was a girl called Ann, and a much more of an outside chance her surname was Field, if there was though, Adam would have seen this as an omen, given that there probably wasn't a Mary at the school and she definitely would not have been a Saint, we might be stuffed on this fact alone.

9. There is a direct coach service from West Quay Coach Station to Liverpool it leaves daily at 13.20 and takes a little over 8 hours, it does start in Poole though so Adam could get it from there or probably Bournemouth, in case he is reading this the cheapest fare is £33.10.

10. Adam is one of the country's most renowned experts on Piers, he lives in an apartment in Bournemouth overlooking the pier and last year went on Mastermind with his specialist subject being British Piers 1876 to the present day scoring a respectable 12 to lead after the first round although a disastrous general knowledge section put paid to his hopes of further advanacement in the competition. In Liverpool he could buy an apartment overlooking Pier Head, although in fairness this is not much of a pier with the only penny slot amusements available being slotting pennies into the hands of the local drunks.

So there you have it, these ten facts can only lead to one conclusion and that is that Adam Lallana is off to Liverpool and that he is taking Dejan Lovren and at least one other team mate with him.

In tomorrow's soaraway TUI we reveal Jos Hooiveld's heartbreak at being overlooked by Manchester City

Photo: Action Images

slynch added 10:36 - May 20 I don't think Lallana is linked to Liverpool, I've heard there's a French Connection.
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