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Tottenham scouting report leaked 00:51 - Feb 16 with 4250 viewsDaley_Lama

Early warning: Broadsheets and Red Tops will print tomorrow a leaked report of scouting by RAFC of Tottenham ever since the two clubs were drawn to play each other in the FA Cup.

This behind the scenes expose of football life will shock fans to the core and leave questions unanswered about security, privacy and player safety.

I think it is only fair that this should be seen by Rochdale Fans first, before the proverbial hits the proverbial. So here it is.

Rochdale Association Football Club Scouting Report: Tottenham Hotspur
Date: 14/2/18
Signed: ********

Manager: Typical Cockney, hard to understand.

1. Hugo Lloris: Very tall
2. Kieran Trippier: Bit rough as from Burnley
3. Danny Rose: Runs a lot
4. Toby Alderwield: Foreign
5. Jan Vertonghen: Also Foreign
7: Heung-Min Son: Really Foreign
10. Kane: Shoots a lot. Watch out.
11: Erik Lamela: Named after a Terry Gilliam film.
13: Michael Vorm: Dutch: Vormsprung durch technick as they say in Rotterdam.
15: Eric Dier: Better than his name suggests
17: Moussa Sissoko: Geordie
18: Fernando Llorente: Flashy Spaniard
20: Dele Alli: Softy
22: Paul Gazzaniga: Geordie.
23: Eriksen: Tricky
24; Serge Aurier: Made in Chelsea chap
29: Harry Winks: Youth Team Player
33: Ben Davies: Notts County reject
37: Kyle Walker-Peters: Double barrelled posh boy.

Tottenham usually play a 11 player formation which can range from having 1 goalkeeper and 10 outfield players or 10 outfield players and a goalkeeper. They are prone to attack both wide and through the middle and try to shoot when they think they can score.

Player to watch out for: Ricardo Villa, tough tackling no nonsense defender



Poll: DF in or out

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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 08:45 - Feb 16 with 3971 viewsUnmoderatedCF

Spot on i would say
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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 17:06 - Feb 16 with 3392 viewsfrequency

looks like kane might be out injured

Hate city

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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 18:11 - Feb 16 with 3303 viewsYorkshire_Dale

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 08:45 - Feb 16 by UnmoderatedCF

Spot on i would say


What about Dembele?


The one that makes em tick............Hilly sees him as the "one to watch"
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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 09:44 - Feb 17 with 3012 viewsAtThePeake

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 18:11 - Feb 16 by Yorkshire_Dale

What about Dembele?


The one that makes em tick............Hilly sees him as the "one to watch"


Dembele has struggled earlier in the season with injuries, so on the back of the Arsenal and Juventus games (in which he was man of the match in both for me) I'd expect to see him rested with Winks/Wanyama/Sissoko as the midfield three.

Tangled up in blue.

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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 09:49 - Feb 17 with 3001 viewsKoober1974

Sounds about right from those south of Birmingham. The really foreign one is one to watch out for, Kane is out but llorente is in, see how he likes Wilbutts chippy and a trip round Rochdale.
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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 10:06 - Feb 17 with 2967 viewsmexmike

Kieran Trippier is actually worse, hes a bucket not Burnley!!
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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 10:09 - Feb 17 with 2956 viewsColDale

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 10:06 - Feb 17 by mexmike

Kieran Trippier is actually worse, hes a bucket not Burnley!!


I believe his brother is now calling himself Kelvin Trippier as opposed to the Lomax when he played for us
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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:07 - Feb 17 with 2760 viewsShun

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 09:49 - Feb 17 by Koober1974

Sounds about right from those south of Birmingham. The really foreign one is one to watch out for, Kane is out but llorente is in, see how he likes Wilbutts chippy and a trip round Rochdale.


I absolutely love Son. He's my favourite player to watch play because he clearly just loves life, I've never seen him sans a smile.
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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:08 - Feb 17 with 2759 viewsKoober1974

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:07 - Feb 17 by Shun

I absolutely love Son. He's my favourite player to watch play because he clearly just loves life, I've never seen him sans a smile.


Nice to know.
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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:11 - Feb 17 with 2754 viewsTVOS1907

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:07 - Feb 17 by Shun

I absolutely love Son. He's my favourite player to watch play because he clearly just loves life, I've never seen him sans a smile.


I've got to ask, Shun, because you've done it before, but why write 'sans' instead of 'without'?

It's only three more letters and is actually English instead of French.

Undoubted knowledge? Or just the application of common sense and using my brain?

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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:46 - Feb 17 with 2691 viewsShun

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:11 - Feb 17 by TVOS1907

I've got to ask, Shun, because you've done it before, but why write 'sans' instead of 'without'?

It's only three more letters and is actually English instead of French.


Three letters is quite a lot when your phone types as slowly as mine does! And although 'sans' is a French word I've definitely seen it used a lot in English parlance, much like 'chic' or 'hors d'oeuvre'.
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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:48 - Feb 17 with 2685 viewsR17ALE

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:11 - Feb 17 by TVOS1907

I've got to ask, Shun, because you've done it before, but why write 'sans' instead of 'without'?

It's only three more letters and is actually English instead of French.


Because he's down avec the kids?

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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:57 - Feb 17 with 2657 viewsTVOS1907

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:46 - Feb 17 by Shun

Three letters is quite a lot when your phone types as slowly as mine does! And although 'sans' is a French word I've definitely seen it used a lot in English parlance, much like 'chic' or 'hors d'oeuvre'.


Might be time for a nouveau phone then!

Undoubted knowledge? Or just the application of common sense and using my brain?

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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:59 - Feb 17 with 2652 viewsTVOS1907

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:48 - Feb 17 by R17ALE

Because he's down avec the kids?


I think you might find it's 'avec les enfants', you koont.

Undoubted knowledge? Or just the application of common sense and using my brain?

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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 14:11 - Feb 17 with 2606 viewsnordenblue

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 13:59 - Feb 17 by TVOS1907

I think you might find it's 'avec les enfants', you koont.


You and R17 must have an attraction surely,with one of you being a coont and the other a dick(allegedly)?
[Post edited 17 Feb 2018 14:13]
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Tottenham scouting report leaked on 14:15 - Feb 17 with 2581 viewsD_Alien

Tottenham scouting report leaked on 14:11 - Feb 17 by nordenblue

You and R17 must have an attraction surely,with one of you being a coont and the other a dick(allegedly)?
[Post edited 17 Feb 2018 14:13]


TVOS is reputedly one of the best organs in the football league

[Post edited 17 Feb 2018 14:15]

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