Once again we risk the wrath of the home counties, this time Tottenham Hotspur are the target of our light hearted look at their history.
Tottenham Hotspur were alledgedly formed by a group of youths standing on a street corner on Tottenham High Road in 1882, a past time still popular in the area today, back then finding the local saspirilla shop had put up some rather fetching iron shutters and unable to find a horse and cart to ram raid it with, instead they founded a football club. The first part of the name was easy but the second a bit more difficult, they settled on the name of a local hero Harry Hotspur, ironically enough his battle cry "Down to the bare bones with Harry" proved to be prophetical.
The clubs first ground was Tottenham marshes, a sort of more upmarket Hackney Marshes in those days, although the use of the best pitches were gained by battles with other teams, coining the phrase pitched battle, after the Marshes were bought up by Morrissons in 1898 the club moved to Northumberland Park, this was mistaken for an electrical store and burned down in that years August riots when a large number of Gramophones were stolen and the club moved 100 yards down the road to their present home White Hart Lane.
The club crest a Cockerel came from the crest of Harry Hotspur and in 1909 the club gained its first nickname "North London Yobbos" over 90 years before Rupert Lowe after reading about Harry Hotspur in that weeks Beano re christened them.
Although they are known for their white shirts, Spurs actually didnt play in white until 1898 when they switched from their chocolate & Gold striped kit to white a colour they felt wouldnt run in the wash.
Their long standing rivalry with Arsenal didnt start up till 1913, up until then the Gunners had played at Woolwich which was a long way from Tottenham and it riled the Spurs faithful when a bunch of South London Yobbos plotted up a few miles down the road and started nicking their supporters, something that traditionally was the responsibility of the Metropolitan Police, a tradition that still holds fast today.
The club motto is Audere Est Facere which in English translates to "Down to the bare bones" well it would be nice if it did, but in reality it means To Dare Is To Do a reference to The Human League album of 1981.
Spurs bear the brunt of the anti semetic abuse in football, due to the North London Jewish community being quite near to the ground, in reality although Spurs do have a large Jweish support, its not really any more prominent than at other London clubs, but is highlighted by the clubs own fans calling themself Yids.
Spurs refer to Saints as South Coast Yobbos, stemming from January 1968 when Saints, bullied Bill Nicholson the then Spurs manager into taking Martin Chivers as a makeweight in the deal that brought Frank Saul to the Dell, local boy Chivers chained himself to a lampost in Milton Road and begged Ted Bates not to sell him, but eventually bolt cutters were found and Chivers was forcibly driven to White hart Lane to sign, Frank Saul meanwhile was overwhelmed at his good fortune. Nicholson sulked about the deal for days and mumbled something about Bare Bones as he drove back to London.
Saints and Spurs share the record of being the only Southern League Clubs to reach an FA Cup Final in an era when football was dominated by Northern teams, however this record could come under extreme threat next season when PST Portsmouth launch their inaugral season in the FA Cup with a home tie against Dunstable at Fratton Park
Spurs fans are noted for their fair sporting behavior and their ability to take a joke as was proved when stealing Glenn Hoddle from Saints, goodwill messages from Hertfordshire flooded the messageboard of this very website, all done in a jovial fashion of course and although initially some thought that they were very bitter and twisted and had a chip on their shoulder about being in the shadow of Arsenal, it soon became clear that they were joshing with us and just wanted to show that they didnt take themselves that seriously after all.
Spurs are one of a very select club, one comprised of teams that have played at St Mary's but have never scored there, although in truth it looks likely that they wont be in that club much past 3pm on Sunday, for the record Saints have played Spurs five times at SMS, four in the league and once in the cup, all four league games have finished 1-0 to the Saints ( a score that at the moment you can get about 3000/1 at most bookmakers as of Tuesday night) with our FA Cup win 4-0 being the most satisfying