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Spurs Certain To Sign Danny Ings After Harry Kane Damages Toe Nail.
Friday, 29th Jan 2021 10:52

Within seconds of Harry Kane limping out of Tottenham Hotspur's defeat at home to Liverpool, Spurs fans were taking to social media to demand the signing of Southampton's Danny Ings and within the hour it was being claimed as a done deal.

Thursday evening was meant to be the night that Tottenham Hotspur confirmed their Premier League title credentials by slaughtering out of form Liverpool, a win that would see them soar to 4th in the table and ready to take on the Manchester clubs for the title run in.

But if their dreams of being the nations top club were dashed, then they had another shock as they didn't even end the evening as London's top club in the table, West Ham United taking that accolade as the week's fixtures ended.

But there was even more bad news for the Tottenham faithful, Harry Kane did not re appear in the second half after suffering not one but two toe nail injuries, if they had both been on the same foot then the England striker would have surely soldiered on, after all he only needs one big toe fit in order to poke the ball over the line from two yards, but with both being ruled too painful to continue he was forced to accept that his night was over and wrap them both up in some frozen peas, Spurs being in around £975 million of debt at the moment, finding it cheaper to treat injuries with frozen Peas rather than use expensive Ice.

This makes it all the more strange that Tottenham supporters immediately took to social media demanding the signing of Danny Ings in the next 24 hours, the numbers were so great that within a short space of time some very important media outlets were tipping this to be a done deal.

In the Express none other than former Aston Villa frontman Gabby Agbonlahor believed that Spurs should make their move in the final few days of the window:

"[Harry] Kane could play as a number 10, behind Ings or vice-versa to be honest they can both play there.

"I just think it would take Spurs to the next level, they’re missing that extra striker with top, top quality.

"I do like Vinicius but I think if you get Danny Ings you’re making a statement and he could be the reason they go on and finish in the top four this season."

Gabby was very surprised to get the call from the Express, since retiring from football he has been working as a supervisor in the Aston Villa programme sales department and is currently furloughed.

It is believed that the Express had meant to phone Gabby Logan a credible sports pundit, but got their Gabby's mixed up being next to each other in the phone book, an easy mistake to make.

I am sure there are other media outlets dragging up Ex professional footballers to give bland comments, but this is my favourite.

Anyway when you are looking for the headline "Danny Ings tipped to join Spurs" you need to have someone actually tip him to do so and a retired Aston Villa player with no connections to either Spurs or Saints and for that matter no other obvious connection to the player himself is as good a source as any.

Twitter was full of delirious Spurs fans or did i mean deluded ? such gems as "Get it done Levy" "unbelievable" "We will definitely win the League and be on a par with Huddersfield now" started to appear on twitter and other social media sites, they may have been on tic tok but being over 24 I don't really know what that is.

The sad part of the story is that Harry Kane once the golden boy of White Hart Lane, limped out of the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium quietly through a back door, when asked by the waiting media pack about his toe nails, clearly rattled by the rumours that he was about to be usurped as King Of Tottenham after walking past Daniel Levy's office, only to see the Spurs CEO slitting open a sofa with a knife to try and get some loose change, he tetchily replied;

"Its not my toe nails its my ankles don't you know England's European Championship hopes are now hanging by a thread, show me some respect you leeches, it wasn't Danny Ings who saved Gareth Southgate's job in 2018 was it, I'm only going to be out for two games for Christ's sake"

So Saints supporters should brace themselves for the usual bombardment of Spurs friendly media, agents and half of Milton Keynes going ballistic on Social Media.

Winner of the competition for the first sighting of Danny Ings in North London was a Mr Jason Cundy of Hoxton who claims to have spotted the at the moment Saints striker alighting a tube at Seven Sisters station and walking briskly down Tottenham High Road in the direction of the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium at 11.24pm on Thursday night.

The Spot Dele Alli competition is still running as there has been no winner so far.

Photo: Action Images

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IanRC added 11:12 - Jan 29
Disgrace of a club and their chairman is even worse.

dirk_doone added 11:15 - Jan 29
Regardless of how much you dislike Spurs, it's a bit below the belt to make fun of a player because he is injured. We wouldn't like it if fans of other clubs made fun of one of our player's injuries. Kane is likely to be out for several weeks with his ankle injuries. I've always found him to be a likeable character, as well as one of England's best footballers, and wish him a speedy recovery.

highfield49 added 12:20 - Jan 29
Yup, at present, I'm wishing we had a player who could toe poke the ball over the line from two yards.

Colburn added 12:38 - Jan 29
Spurs actions in the past have been a little more than below the belt. Nobody wishes injuries on others but mocking is inevitable when it comes to the misfortunes of those who regularly tread on you..like Spurs. I hope they miss out on champions league again, because I don't like the way they go about their business. Nuts to them..

TimSaint added 12:46 - Jan 29
Hopefully he will be out for 8 weeks, therefore not playing against us when we visit them on 20th March. Oh and I'd like the diving Son to be out for our game too please !! :-)

SaintPaulVW added 13:14 - Jan 29
Harry Kane...I think I'd also have to take a few games off to recover from the shock of PEH shooting and scoring rather than hitting row ZZ.

SonicBoom added 13:44 - Jan 29
Gabby Agbonlahor - the Brummie Shane Long (minus the goals).

halftimeorange added 13:47 - Jan 29
I'm more concerned about the Alexandre Jankewitz rumours of him handing in a transfer request than I am over Danny Ings going to Spurs. We do not want to lose exceptional young talent for nothing.

Jesus_02 added 14:14 - Jan 29
Sorry Dirk.. shall we make fun out of him because he talks like he has just walked into a lamp post?

DellBoyWally added 14:29 - Jan 29
Over-rated referees pet.

underweststand added 15:14 - Jan 29
We really shouldn't make fun of Spurs just because they have huge debts, and their star player is injured ......(Oh yes we can - why not ? ). Although seldom winning any trophies Saints have always been highly regarded for their sportsmanship and willingness to help others by voluntarily selling their best players for paltry sums to help them better their careers, and Spurs have often been the main beneficiary in the past
Now the Saints have the chance to help this once-great club again by going the extra mile to assist them in their hour of need, and typically Saints were first to step forward.
Having already surrendered 3 valuable Prem. points to Spurs' bitter North London rivals during the week, we noted the generosity of Saints CEO Martin Semmens, who was first on the phone to the near-grieving Daniel Levy at Spurs, and offered to loan Danny Ings - for the remaining time until the rest of his contract next summer - as well as sportingly volunteering to pay half of Danny's salary in an attempt to help Spurs' financial struggles with their enormous £1 billion debt on their state-of-the-art arena, whilst Semmens is believed to have shelved the long-overdue paint job on the now-aging St. Marys stadium.

Mr. Levy, who it was believed was expecting to get Ings on a free transfer, was believed to have thanked Semmens for his generous offer, but this is unclear as no-one on the Spurs staff had every heard Levy utter the phrase in the past, and so his exact response remains uncertain. Saints' fans have been divided in their reactions, as many have openly praised Semmens' humanitarian response to this emergency, whilst thousands more stormed
the St. Mary's stadium demanding Semmens' resignation and removal from the Board.
The Echo is monitoring the story closely.

felly1 added 17:08 - Jan 29
Changing the subject, just seen Jake Vokins has joined Sunderland on loan

SanMarco added 23:30 - Jan 29
What I miss from not being on social media (does TUI count?) No chance of Ings going in the next couple of days so Kane injury is irrelevant (to us, not to the Spud attempts to qualify for the Europa League).

Yes felly1 Vokins loan is interesting - surely means someone is coming in?? Maitland-Niles now being mentioned...

Shakin_Stevens added 23:40 - Jan 29
Every time you write these sarcastic articles you end up looking daft when it actually comes to pass. I know nobody wants to believe it but he probably will go to spurs for an unsatisfactory sum. I will be gutted, but it's happened so many times I think most of us just accept it now. Thank god for Ralph, his vision hides a lot of flaws in the way this club is run. And it's got nothing to do with Gao not being able to get his money out of China. He never intended to invest. I just hope we've got a good replacement striker lined up.

Flamingbankers added 00:25 - Jan 30
Vokins out Williams in as predicted? Bertie out? Nick Illingworth out?

SanMarco added 11:18 - Jan 30
Nick has been head-hunted by the Spuds fanzine but he is staying loyal...

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