| Itβs only a laugh ! 10:11 - Aug 12 with 121915 views | KeithHaynes |
Put your jokes, pics etc right here π
Hereβs one.
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 13:28 - Nov 29 with 16998 views | Joesus_Of_Narbereth |
Was reading Yul Bryyners autobiography and it was interesting to learn he had been a massive Liverpool fan but was thrown out and banned from Anfield because he smelled so bad.
Yul never wore cologne. |  |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 20:47 - Dec 3 with 16730 views | Joesus_Of_Narbereth |
I tried to phone the tinnitus helpline but it just kept ringing. | |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 15:52 - Dec 20 with 16205 views | ncswan |
A good friend sent me the following "Farmer's Prayer" today. I thought I would share since it might be appropriate for the Swans AFC senior team:
Farmer's Prayer
(By: Author Unknown)
A pastor asked an older farmer, decked out in bib overalls, to say grace for the morning breakfast.
"Lord, I hate buttermilk", the farmer began. The visiting pastor opened one eye to glance at the farmer and wonder where this was going.
The farmer loudly proclaimed, "Lord, I hate lard." Now the pastor was growing concerned. Without missing a beat, the farmer continued, "And Lord, you know I don't much care for raw white flour".
The pastor once again opened an eye to glance around the room and saw that he wasn't the only one to feel uncomfortable.
Then the farmer added, "But Lord, when you mix them all together and bake them, I do love warm fresh biscuits!
So, Lord, when things come up that we don't like, when life gets hard, when we don't understand what you're saying to us, help us to just relax and wait until you are done mixing. It will probably be even better than biscuits. Amen."
Merry Christmas! |  | | |
| Itβs only a laugh ! on 11:44 - Dec 24 with 16013 views | theloneranger |
Many thanks to my Auntie Bridie in Ireland for sending me 3 socks for Christmas.
I told her over the phone
I'd grown another foot in the past year ...!! |  |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! Γ°ΕΈΛΕ½ |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 14:53 - Feb 20 with 14592 views | Joesus_Of_Narbereth |
Went into a shop and said to the bloke βis there anyone here who can sell me a kettle?β The bloke said βkenwood?β I said βok where is he then?β | |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 18:32 - Mar 4 with 14282 views | theloneranger |
It's been a really strange day, today
First, I found a hat full of money
Then I was chased around town
By a very angry man
Carrying a guitar ...!! | |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! Γ°ΕΈΛΕ½ |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 13:07 - Mar 6 with 14141 views | SullutaCreturned |
2 artists had an art contest, it ended in a draw.
The wife keeps complaining I'm on facebook too much and it's ruining our marriage, so I blocked her.
A lorry carrying Vicks has overturned on the motorway and congestion has since eased.
Don't believe everything you read on a pub toilet door. Sharon is not up for a good time. What an awkward coversation that was...
I'm writing a new musical about a builder that rips people off, it's called "Roofer on the fiddle"
I taught my dog to play the trumper on the Londo underground, we went fro barking to tooting in about an hour.
A lot of wives say their husband never listens to them. I've never heard my MY wife say that.
My thanks to facebook... | | | |
| Itβs only a laugh ! on 22:06 - Mar 13 with 13906 views | max936 |
| Itβs only a laugh ! on 13:07 - Mar 6 by SullutaCreturned |
2 artists had an art contest, it ended in a draw.
The wife keeps complaining I'm on facebook too much and it's ruining our marriage, so I blocked her.
A lorry carrying Vicks has overturned on the motorway and congestion has since eased.
Don't believe everything you read on a pub toilet door. Sharon is not up for a good time. What an awkward coversation that was...
I'm writing a new musical about a builder that rips people off, it's called "Roofer on the fiddle"
I taught my dog to play the trumper on the Londo underground, we went fro barking to tooting in about an hour.
A lot of wives say their husband never listens to them. I've never heard my MY wife say that.
My thanks to facebook... |
Plenty of laughs on this forum reading some posters posts.  |  |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 13:35 - Mar 14 with 13821 views | theloneranger |
A dog is truly a man's best friend.
If you don't believe it - just try my little experiment.
Lock your dog and your wife in the boot of your car for an hour.
When you open the boot
See which one is really happy to see you ??...!! | |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! Γ°ΕΈΛΕ½ |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 00:46 - Mar 15 with 13749 views | Joesus_Of_Narbereth |
I went on a blind date the other night but the girl turned out to be a ghost. She tried to deny it but I knew from the moment she walked through the door. | |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 14:51 - Mar 16 with 13652 views | fbreath |
Why did the hedgehog cross the road
To see his flat mate |  |
| We are the first Welsh club to reach the Premier League Simples |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 09:42 - Mar 17 with 13592 views | theloneranger |
I was watching football on tv yesterday ... and flicked through the channels at half time.
I accidentally found a real hot porno film on another channel.
I said to my wife, "I dont know whether to watch this film or the game"
My wife said, "Jesus Charlie, watch the film"
"You already know how to play football" ...!! | |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! Γ°ΕΈΛΕ½ |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 19:09 - Apr 26 with 12760 views | GixerJack |
Cardiff city, the best Welsh team in league 1 next year |  | | |
| Itβs only a laugh ! on 17:34 - May 2 with 12310 views | metaplay |
| Itβs only a laugh ! on 19:09 - Apr 26 by GixerJack |
Cardiff city, the best Welsh team in league 1 next year |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 19:38 - Jun 5 with 11005 views | theloneranger |
A guy says to his wife ... "Why don't you ever tell me when you orgasm??"
She replied ... "Because I don't like ringing you at work!!" | |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! Γ°ΕΈΛΕ½ |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 17:58 - Jun 14 with 10722 views | theloneranger |
A blonde pushes her BMW into a garage.
She tells the Mechanic it died.
After he works on it for a few minutes, it's idling smoothly.
She asks him, "What's the story" ??
He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor'"
She then says, 'How often do I have to do that" ?? ...!! | |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! Γ°ΕΈΛΕ½ |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 14:03 - Jun 16 with 10584 views | dizietsma |
What is the difference between a lentil and a chickpea?
Donald Trump doesn't pay to have a lentil on him. | | | |
| Itβs only a laugh ! on 17:58 - Jul 3 with 10091 views | ncswan |
The Pastor's Ass
The local Pastor entered his donkey in a race and
it won. The Pastor was so pleased with his donkey
that he entered it in the race again and it won again.
The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.
The regional Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the
Pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.
The next day the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.
This was too much for the Bishop so he ordered the Pastor to get rid of the donkey.
The Pastor decided to give it to a Nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day: NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.
The Bishop fainted. He informed the Nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10.
The next day the paper read: NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.
This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the Nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.
The next day the headlines read: NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.
The Bishop was buried the next day.
The moral of the story is . . . Being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery, and may shorten your life. So be yourself and enjoy life. Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll be a lot happier and live longer! | | | |
| Itβs only a laugh ! on 09:01 - Aug 6 with 9464 views | theloneranger |
"What's the difference between a tramp and a MP" ??
One sits about on a bench all day - usually falling asleep - enjoys long liquid lunches, and contributes nothing to society.
The other one's ...
A tramp ...!! | |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! Γ°ΕΈΛΕ½ |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 11:35 - Aug 20 with 9024 views | theloneranger |
One night, two women walking home drunk from the pub were busting for the toilet.
So they went into the local graveyard.
They had no toilet paper, so one woman used her knickers and threw them away. The other used a ribbon from a wreath.
The next day their husbands were talking.
One said, "We'd better keep an eye on our wives when they go out"
"Mine came home without her knickers"
"You think that's bad" said the other - "Mine had a card stuck to her arse, saying"
"From all the lads at the fire station" - "We'll never forget you" ...!! | |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! Γ°ΕΈΛΕ½ |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 15:06 - Aug 29 with 8370 views | ncswan |
Church Bulletin Miscues
The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks On The Water"; the sermon for tonight: "Searching For Jesus".
Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale! It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
Don't let worry kill you off. Let the Church help. | | | |
| Itβs only a laugh ! on 00:16 - Sep 20 with 3495 views | RhonddaSwans |
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| Itβs only a laugh ! on 22:59 - Sep 24 with 1840 views | ncswan |
From one of my friends here in North Carolina:
I AM A SEENAGER (Senior Teenager)
~ Author Unknown
I have everything that I wanted as a teenager, only 60 years later...
β’ I donβt have to go to school or work.
β’ I get an allowance every month.
β’ I have my own pad.
β’ I donβt have a curfew.
β’ I have a driverβs license and my own car.
β’ And I donβt have acne.
Life is Good!
Also, you will feel much more intelligent after reading this:
Scientists believe that brains of older people are slow because they know so much. People do not decline mentally with age, it just takes them longer to recall facts because they have more information in their brains. Much like a computer struggles as the hard drive gets full, so too, do humans take longer to access information when their brains are full. Researchers say this slowing down process is not the same as cognitive decline. The human brain works slower in old age, said Dr. Michael Ramscar, but only because we have stored more information over time. The brains of older people do not get weak. On the contrary, they simply know more.
Also, older people often go to another room to get something and when they get there, they stand there wondering what they came for. It is NOT a memory problem, it is nature's way of making older people do more exercise.
SO THERE!!
I have more friends I should send this to, but right now I can't remember their names. So, please forward this to your friends; they may be my friends, too.
++++++++++++
Have a great day and enjoy the rest of your week.
Thought for the Day: "We need to understand that life is not what we're given. It's what we create, what we conquer, and what we aim to achieve." (Author Unknown) | | | |
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