Bluffers Guide to Crewe
Friday, 29th Jul 2011 07:00 by Col

Crewe are our final opponents of the pre-season campaign, and whilst we've been plenty of times, here's everything you could possibly want to know about the Alex.

Crewe in a nutshell..... We all know what Crewe are like after having to suffer twenty years of the local media ramming it down our throats at every opportunity. That said, the only surprising thing about the Alex is that there wasn't a string of clubs using them as a blueprint for success given their production line of players such as David Platt, Robbie Savage, Rob Jones, Dean Ashton, Neil Lennon, Seth Johnson, Ryan Lowe and Danny Murphy. What's rarely mentioned is that they've all called it quits now with the exception of the soon to retire Murphy and Lowe which perhaps tells its own story about their recent fortunes.

Who's the gaffer..... It's still that man Dario G. It goes without saying that it seems almost criminal that the FA never looked to someone like Gradi and gave him carte blanche to do what he wanted with youth development. Anyway, the FA's loss was Crewe's gain, and something like 30 years on Gradi is still with them. The principles might still be the same but you have to wonder whether he is perhaps passing his sell by date these days as the last couple of seasons have seen them struggle to pull up any trees. Of course, Gradi is such a sacred cow that he is almost unsackable

The current lot..... Alex seem to have found themselves in a bit of a rut right now, and if truth be told, only the most optimistic Alex fan would hold out any major hopes of this cycle being broken soon. Last season was the first season since 2004 where they actually improved their league position from the season before, but if the finish of 10th place offered hope for this year, it will be tempered by the free transfer loss of League Two top scorer Clayton Donaldson who's 29 goals will prove very difficult to replace. Of course, there should be little chance of Crewe being dragged into the relegation battle at the bottom, but they certainly remain unfancied by the bookies in terms of achieving anything this coming season and with just one signing at time of writing over the Summer, it seems their odds of 40-1 seem spot on.

Played for both Dale and Crewe...... Robbie Wakenshaw, Paul Tait, Steve Macauley, Anthony Elding, Owain Fon Williams, Danny Glover

Dull but true..... Crewe tried to continue their famous youth policy when their Chief Scout reported to Dario Gradi raving about some young player he'd seen starring in the Evo Stick League for Radcliffe Borough. Gradi wasn't so keen, and the young prospect was forced to sign for his local side instead.

Youtube Golden Moment.... A few highlights from David Platt's younger days

class="storytext">He was a bit good..... The real David Platt was certainly a bit special when he was with the Alex. Having been rejected by United as a youngster, the Oldham born midfielder joined Crewe and he was pretty much a success story from the word go. He spent three seasons with Crewe - perhaps far longer than would have happened these days, and from memory he was the stand out player in the division, scoring a hatful of goals from midfield, and in hindsight it was something of a steal when Villa came in and paid £200,000 for him when he was considered one of the best young prospects in the game. The rest as they say is history as his career went on to take to some of the biggest clubs in the world. He may be a crap manager and the world's dullest man in interviews, but we'll forgive him everything for that moment in 1990 when we were all busy working out our five penalty takers.

Try not to mention..... Manchester City. "Blue Moon" was a regular on the Crewe terraces for many a year, before it was hijacked by the Eastlands mob. Ever since it has been passed off as one of their own by City and Crewe come across as the rip off merchants. Other songs from the City repetoire include Delilah, You'll Never Walk Alone and Up The Dale.

Crewe's famous five