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If you want me on a match day, you’ll find me at the Clubhouse drinking cocktails in a sophisticated environment where the subtle lighting evokes the atmosphere of an operating theatre, the polystyrene ceiling tiles, sprinklers and A/C grills pay tribute to the sort of airless room in which you might find yourself attending an IT security course, and where the chrome barstools with white leather cushioning nod knowingly to the trendy cocktail bars of post-Soviet Moscow.
This is exactly what the Cottage has been crying out for, these past 120 years. A brightly lit room where people can drink cocktails under a low polystyrene ceiling. Like drinking on a spaceship.
Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts
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Modern football is great - we've got a gin bar! on 10:06 - Dec 8 with 2352 views
Modern football is great - we've got a gin bar! on 08:48 - Dec 8 by Konk
Well, it sounds like things have improved on the catering front. That’s good to hear as away fans get thirsty too and even though they might not appreciate Gin, they still need access to lager. It’s very important to know your market. Whilst “The Clubhouse” might work at Fulham, with its gin-swilling metropolitans from the world of finance, media and law, it wouldn’t necessarily work at somewhere like Gillingham.
The design agency I’ve just created have actually been approached about supporters bar facilities at the proposed Old Oak Common stadium. The intention is to offer a space that will be used on non-match days and also be a destination in its own right with a unique offering. It’s a very delicate balancing act, because whilst the club are looking to attract new (wealthier) supporters and corporate clients, they’re very keen to avoid alienating the existing desperately poor and working class fan base. They want to embrace the future, whilst holding onto the past. So, what we’re proposing is that within the stadium footprint, we construct Britain’s largest flat roof pub. We’re calling it “The Footy Boozer”. A pub that can accommodate up to 2,000 drinkers with 84 large TV screens showing Premier League football, Horse racing, Casualty and Who wants to be a millionaire. There will be a meat raffle on match days, karaoke and a team of club shop employees going from table to table, offering supporters the chance to buy club shop merchandise from a large Sports direct bag. We’ll be running Meal deal/Stella & Wotsits promotions and really trying to encourage supporters to view “The Footy Boozer” as somewhere they can bring the family and then ignore them as they get involved in heated discussions with strangers at the bar about whether or not Theo Walcott is “absolute pony”. Exciting times.
Pictured above: Local children employed to re-comb the Clubhouse carpet at the end of the evening. Paid only in stale canapes, they are simply grateful to be out of the rain.
'What do we want? We don't know! When do we want it? Now!'
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Modern football is great - we've got a gin bar! on 10:46 - Dec 8 with 2319 views
Modern football is great - we've got a gin bar! on 08:12 - Dec 8 by Konk
Red trousers, obviously, and from the looks of the promotional material, you'll need a thick winter coat, hat and scarves. No need to adopt a new persona - just say you don't really no much about the football, but it looks like fun. Maybe talk about Will Carling and Bill Beaumont for a bit and skiing.
I like the fact that the photos promoting this sophisticated gin palace involve a lot of people wearing coats, hats and scarves. It looks like a great cosy place to unwind and relax. Stood up. In your outdoor winter clothes. In a very bright room.
I think we might be going for the Ice bar crowd:
I'm a big fan of the "Being John Malkovich 7 1/2 floor" tribute ceiling. Bit of a squeeze if you're wearing a bobble hat.
Never mind the sterile environment - there are nibbles as well - and a menu! Frankly, I'm so disillusioned by football these days that I may just approach FFC and ask for an exclusive season ticket to 'The Clubhouse'. What really impresses me is that fact that there is no flat screen TV with Sky Sports showing anywhere in the place - it's almost as if the football is a secondary matter and that's laissez faire to the point of being extremely cool (like an ice bar).
[Post edited 8 Dec 2016 10:48]
"Thank you for supporting Queens Park Rangers Steep Staircase"... and I thought I'd signed up for a rollercoaster.
Modern football is great - we've got a gin bar! on 10:06 - Dec 8 by A40Bosh
So The OCA is the blueprint then?
In terms of décor, we’ve certainly incorporated some of what’s best about the OCA: the sauna-style pine panelling, Tudor beams, and the floor tiles that look like they’ve been liberated from a Spanish Villa complex. With such a huge venue, we thought it was important to create partitions within the room, so we’ve ordered 2,000m of banister kit including handrails, posts and spindles.
[Post edited 8 Dec 2016 10:54]
Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts
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Modern football is great - we've got a gin bar! on 13:09 - Dec 8 with 2262 views
"...the first to open a bespoke gin bar". Hmm, not all firsts are worth shouting about:
- First club to be on the triads' hit list - First club to have a dodgy statue of Michael Jackson.
However, it was with some relief that I read that there is now a "hub" for gin fans. When it comes to societal change, that's right up there with the abolition of slavery.
RFA (cider drinking wussy lightweight)
"Things had started becoming increasingly desperate at Loftus Road but QPR have been handed a massive lifeline and the place has absolutely erupted. it's carnage. It's bedlam. It's 1-1."
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Modern football is great - we've got a gin bar! on 13:15 - Dec 8 with 2256 views
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