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Ever since my son was... never conceived, because I've never had consensual sex without money involved... I've always kind of looked at you as... a thing, that I could live next to... in accordance with state laws.
I once worked in a kitchen and the assistant to the chef was gorgeous, she never showed any interest in me, even though I followed her everywhere. Realising I would never get anywhere near her let alone internally I made what I believe now to be a good choice,
I w@nked in the mash one evening knowing she would be dining out on a salty treat after work. Having a bit of grub after shift was a perk. And she did, she said it was the best mash she had tasted. My mate reasoned with me that it was the only way I was going to get any spunk in her, which I found comforting at the time. In fact it reassured me that what I did was perfectly right and normal as a part of the dating process.
I told my mum as well, but she didn't make any comment.
Nolan sympathiser, clout expert, personal friend of Leigh Dineen, advocate and enforcer of porridge swallows.
The official inventor of the tit w@nk.
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