| Self Service 2015 .. the legends are back :) 05:14 - Mar 30 with 6353 views | Barsidepete |
Will delete this initial post & edit it. Blokes, you know why. Thank you Toot and PWK and other legends for returning. Noah, you are so verbose. [Post edited 26 Apr 2015 4:26]
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 12:24 - Mar 30 with 2166 views | noah4x4 |
Noah4x4 volunteers to be a "dementia friend' to anybody that fails to remember the primary topics in the last 'self service' thread.
Pete, do you have them in the USA or must one become forgetful alone? |  | | |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 12:36 - Mar 30 with 2161 views | Barsidepete |
You make me smile 
We used to have about 7-8 incarnations of the Self Service thread. Not actually sure who invented it first. (TOOT, obviously, but must step up to confirm, take blame). ..we reached 1000-plus posts once back in the day, and I don't even recall what site we were on  .. we bounced around if you recall. We got moved from one place to another at the drop of a hat, and Dan can confirm this 
How about top gear .. one of those week to week threads went on and onward.
We even had a sidebar about food. But then again, we are flexible.
What was the last topic, Noah? [Post edited 2 Apr 2015 3:19]
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 17:23 - Mar 30 with 2128 views | noah4x4 |
Er,.., can you ask my 'dementia friend'?
Indeed who is he?
But wasn't it something to do with the price of tripe? [Post edited 30 Mar 2015 17:24]
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 18:43 - Mar 30 with 2121 views | Leadbelly |
The "self service" thread came to mind last week whilst in Tesco. Some apparatchik was trying to make me use the said evil device and I was steadfast in my refusal. Won't use them on principle...and due to techno fear. |  |
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 18:55 - Mar 30 with 2116 views | thrillseeker |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 18:43 - Mar 30 by Leadbelly |
The "self service" thread came to mind last week whilst in Tesco. Some apparatchik was trying to make me use the said evil device and I was steadfast in my refusal. Won't use them on principle...and due to techno fear. |
I had this horrible picture of Pete in my head with the acclaimed title including 'self service 2015' but grateful Leadbelly has clarified for me 
Sorry for trawling the depths of my imagination | | | |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 18:56 - Mar 30 with 2116 views | wessex_exile |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 18:43 - Mar 30 by Leadbelly |
The "self service" thread came to mind last week whilst in Tesco. Some apparatchik was trying to make me use the said evil device and I was steadfast in my refusal. Won't use them on principle...and due to techno fear. |
Gotta admire their style though - it's a cunning plan to charge checkout salaries on to us the consumers through their mark-up...and then make us do our own checkout anyway!! I deal with archaeological investigations in the development sector, so it's a bit like me billing a housing developer for work, at the same time as a shovel and telling him to get on with it.
P.S. If anyone else sees the Royal Ascot advert at the top of the page, the numbskulls have spelled "tommorrow" [sic] wrong! |  |
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 06:18 - Mar 31 with 2067 views | Barsidepete |
Tesco, hmm. They have nice greens and such:) don't have much of a problem with them. | |
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 10:36 - Mar 31 with 2049 views | TheOldOakTree |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 12:36 - Mar 30 by Barsidepete |
You make me smile
We used to have about 7-8 incarnations of the Self Service thread. Not actually sure who invented it first. (TOOT, obviously, but must step up to confirm, take blame). ..we reached 1000-plus posts once back in the day, and I don't even recall what site we were on .. we bounced around if you recall. We got moved from one place to another at the drop of a hat, and Dan can confirm this
How about top gear .. one of those week to week threads went on and onward.
We even had a sidebar about food. But then again, we are flexible.
What was the last topic, Noah? [Post edited 2 Apr 2015 3:19]
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For the record, twas I that unintentionally started the original colossal Self Service thread many years ago, after ranting about my frustration of being stuck behind a selfish retard that thought it hilarious to allow his four year old to take an eternity to scan his shopping.
What really started the endless posts of trivia was a reply from someone suggesting that there was no place for non-football related posts on the board.
To appease the fellow boarder, I vaguely remember changing the post from something like “Doesn’t it drive you mad to be stuck behind an idiot at a self-service checkout” to “Doesn’t it drive you mad to be on your way to football and get stuck behind an idiot at a self-service checkout”, for some inexplicable reason that ignited a seemingly never ending cascade of non-football related posts, mostly based on little more than codswallop.
As my unintentional actions are the closest thing to any claim to fame that I am ever likely to achieve, it is fitting that TOOT should forever be connected with talking complete b@ll@cks. | | | |
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 10:52 - Mar 31 with 2045 views | TheOldOakTree |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 18:56 - Mar 30 by wessex_exile |
Gotta admire their style though - it's a cunning plan to charge checkout salaries on to us the consumers through their mark-up...and then make us do our own checkout anyway!! I deal with archaeological investigations in the development sector, so it's a bit like me billing a housing developer for work, at the same time as a shovel and telling him to get on with it.
P.S. If anyone else sees the Royal Ascot advert at the top of the page, the numbskulls have spelled "tommorrow" [sic] wrong! |
Hello Wessex
I'm pretty sure that the ads we see are personalised, based on our browsing history (Big Brother and all that).
It comes as no surprise that whilst most of us are viewing adverts for payday loans, food-banks or ladyboy escorts, you are seeing adverts for Royal Ascot.
[Post edited 31 Mar 2015 11:03]
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 11:52 - Mar 31 with 2034 views | gerry_us |
Good to see TOOT and PWK return to the board. Oh for the good old days!
I got behind a lady in a petrol pay queue yesterday who came only armed with a £10 note but was asked to pay £10.01. Reminded me of an Alas Smith and Jones sketch ( I think) when they hit a button on their till to add on another penny to everyone's rounded equal pound petrol fill. I digress.
This lady refused to pay the £.01 as she "only wanted £10 of petrol and it was not her fault if the meter had gone over"...??? Me being ultra nice offered her the penny and was told to "f**k off; who did I think I was offering charity?"...Ahhh! At this point the attendant suggested clamping her car while he called the police...you couldn't write this stuff; at which point the "lady" asked if I could let her have the penny? I should have said.....%*&^% off, but wanted to get home so proffered the enormous sum to everyone's relief.
So....it's back to the check-out stories then. [Post edited 31 Mar 2015 17:52]
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 12:00 - Mar 31 with 2032 views | wessex_exile |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 11:52 - Mar 31 by gerry_us |
Good to see TOOT and PWK return to the board. Oh for the good old days!
I got behind a lady in a petrol pay queue yesterday who came only armed with a £10 note but was asked to pay £10.01. Reminded me of an Alas Smith and Jones sketch ( I think) when they hit a button on their till to add on another penny to everyone's rounded equal pound petrol fill. I digress.
This lady refused to pay the £.01 as she "only wanted £10 of petrol and it was not her fault if the meter had gone over"...??? Me being ultra nice offered her the penny and was told to "f**k off; who did I think I was offering charity?"...Ahhh! At this point the attendant suggested clamping her car while he called the police...you couldn't write this stuff; at which point the "lady" asked if I could let her have the penny? I should have said.....%*&^% off, but wanted to get home so proffered the enormous sum to everyone's relief.
So....it's back to the check-out stories then. [Post edited 31 Mar 2015 17:52]
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Haha - nice one TOOT, can't bloody move for Larks tongues in Aspic adverts today.
Gerry, I'm pretty certain in the Alas Smith and Jones sketch is was actually a halfpenny, which dates it nicely, but our local garage instigated a very "Big Society" solution to the problem, a tray on the counter that customers could throw the odd penny change into, so that other customers could take the odd penny out of if they accidentally ticked over - it worked too! | |
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 13:16 - Mar 31 with 2026 views | Leadbelly |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 12:00 - Mar 31 by wessex_exile |
Haha - nice one TOOT, can't bloody move for Larks tongues in Aspic adverts today.
Gerry, I'm pretty certain in the Alas Smith and Jones sketch is was actually a halfpenny, which dates it nicely, but our local garage instigated a very "Big Society" solution to the problem, a tray on the counter that customers could throw the odd penny change into, so that other customers could take the odd penny out of if they accidentally ticked over - it worked too! |
Otter's noses and wolf nipple chips as well no doubt | |
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 13:41 - Mar 31 with 2024 views | pwrightsknees |
I don't want solar panels or replacement double-glazing and my loft is insulated. I don't have a PPI problem and I'm happy with my pension arrangements. I haven't had an accident at work, and no-one in the household needs a stairlift. Nor is my computer about to crash.
As for surveys and questionnaires, they can all mind their own damn business.
Must go as the phone's ringing - probably a call centre! | | | |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 17:20 - Mar 31 with 2018 views | TheOldOakTree |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 13:41 - Mar 31 by pwrightsknees |
I don't want solar panels or replacement double-glazing and my loft is insulated. I don't have a PPI problem and I'm happy with my pension arrangements. I haven't had an accident at work, and no-one in the household needs a stairlift. Nor is my computer about to crash.
As for surveys and questionnaires, they can all mind their own damn business.
Must go as the phone's ringing - probably a call centre! |
For years I have sent back the 'Freepost' or reply paid envelopes that come with unsolicited junk mail, with either rubbish from other firms inside of just leaving them empty, knowing that the recipient will have to pay for the privilege of getting junk back.
I figure that if everyone did the same, it would bankrupt the b@st@rds and stop them from pestering people and wasting paper.
As an added bonus, it provides work for the posties, so if my idea catches on, anyone who bought Royal Mail shares might like to buy me a pint for the increased profits it would create in the short term.
Did I once have an avatar of an Oak Tree, instead of the FN logo, or did I dream it?
Maybe it was on one of the previous sites  [Post edited 31 Mar 2015 17:29]
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 17:54 - Mar 31 with 2002 views | gerry_us |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 13:16 - Mar 31 by Leadbelly |
Otter's noses and wolf nipple chips as well no doubt |
I've got Slimming World ads....cheeky sods  | | | |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 18:41 - Mar 31 with 1997 views | thrillseeker |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 17:20 - Mar 31 by TheOldOakTree |
For years I have sent back the 'Freepost' or reply paid envelopes that come with unsolicited junk mail, with either rubbish from other firms inside of just leaving them empty, knowing that the recipient will have to pay for the privilege of getting junk back.
I figure that if everyone did the same, it would bankrupt the b@st@rds and stop them from pestering people and wasting paper.
As an added bonus, it provides work for the posties, so if my idea catches on, anyone who bought Royal Mail shares might like to buy me a pint for the increased profits it would create in the short term.
Did I once have an avatar of an Oak Tree, instead of the FN logo, or did I dream it?
Maybe it was on one of the previous sites [Post edited 31 Mar 2015 17:29]
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Funnily enough I do exactly the same.
1. Cost to the sender of said junk mail
2. Keeps Royal Mail busy
3. I send alternative junk mail so they get annoyed just I like do when receiving totally unwanted junk mail | | | |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 20:03 - Mar 31 with 1989 views | pwrightsknees |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 18:41 - Mar 31 by thrillseeker |
Funnily enough I do exactly the same.
1. Cost to the sender of said junk mail
2. Keeps Royal Mail busy
3. I send alternative junk mail so they get annoyed just I like do when receiving totally unwanted junk mail |
Me, too. | | | |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 20:52 - Mar 31 with 1980 views | wessex_exile |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 18:41 - Mar 31 by thrillseeker |
Funnily enough I do exactly the same.
1. Cost to the sender of said junk mail
2. Keeps Royal Mail busy
3. I send alternative junk mail so they get annoyed just I like do when receiving totally unwanted junk mail |
This is a cracking idea - normally mine stays in my hand for as long as it takes me to carry it from the doormat to the paper recycling bag, which is obviously quite a trek from the entrance hall to the servants quarters in the East Wing, but from now on I think I'll get the wrinkled retainer to "return to sender" post haste. | |
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, and TOOT is back :D on 22:47 - Mar 31 with 1966 views | noah4x4 |
Self service has now taken on a new dimension - hand held self scan machines. You walk around; scan as you go; and fill your own bags - easy peasey - no queue at the check out. So I did...
Fine, until you get to the self check till where they might randomly ask you to m ove to a standard till; empty all of YOUR own bags - they rescan all and treat you like a common criminal. Other people then look on wondering what is going on and 'tutting'.
This happened to me in Waitrose. I asked; "so do you believe I am a shoplifter"?; "NO"; "So have your cameras seen me do something dodgy"?; "NO, so why me"? "It's a random deterrent" came the reply - yes I said, "definitely a deterrent; I won't ever shop here again after the content of my bags checked out at precisely what it said on the hand scanner to the penny". Waitrose can now go and F@@K themselves. | | | |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, and TOOT is back :D on 22:59 - Mar 31 with 1963 views | noah4x4 |
......and another thing about Tesco.
Dunn Humby (marketing) developed their 'club card points' system. It's very clever and tells Tesco all about you and exactly what you buy and when. Then when they issue their monthly magazine and coupons you get a version specifically targetted to your personal shopping habits. There are about 150 versions; each with different coupon sets!
Then (not accusing Tesco of this), but is it any wonder that (say) our pensions information has found its way into unscrupulous hands when we are members of 'club cards', discount shopping etc? I decline to answer ALL irrelevant information when setting up 'accounts'. But somebody will then pester you when you DON'T do/have something. Best bet, pay only cash! Don't ever open 'accounts'. Don't reveal anything that has a value if sold. | | | |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, and TOOT is back :D on 00:31 - Apr 1 with 1946 views | Barsidepete |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, and TOOT is back :D on 22:59 - Mar 31 by noah4x4 |
......and another thing about Tesco.
Dunn Humby (marketing) developed their 'club card points' system. It's very clever and tells Tesco all about you and exactly what you buy and when. Then when they issue their monthly magazine and coupons you get a version specifically targetted to your personal shopping habits. There are about 150 versions; each with different coupon sets!
Then (not accusing Tesco of this), but is it any wonder that (say) our pensions information has found its way into unscrupulous hands when we are members of 'club cards', discount shopping etc? I decline to answer ALL irrelevant information when setting up 'accounts'. But somebody will then pester you when you DON'T do/have something. Best bet, pay only cash! Don't ever open 'accounts'. Don't reveal anything that has a value if sold. |
Well. Look, one thing we're older.dont mean we're not smarter  | |
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| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, and TOOT is back :D on 07:03 - Apr 1 with 1926 views | noah4x4 |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, and TOOT is back :D on 00:31 - Apr 1 by Barsidepete |
Well. Look, one thing we're older.dont mean we're not smarter |
Yeh, buy Camp coffee and Pipe Baccy and you are guranteed to receive a coupon for incontinence pants. | | | |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 08:01 - Apr 1 with 1919 views | thrillseeker |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, past, new thread, onward on 17:54 - Mar 31 by gerry_us |
I've got Slimming World ads....cheeky sods |
I just got the opportunity to purchase London Irish v Edinburgh rugby tickets.
That is unbelievable. Rugby on a football site | | | |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, and TOOT is back :D on 13:05 - Apr 1 with 1897 views | Madeira163 |
I'm getting ad's for Bet365 , obviously my £1 a week I place on COL U to win 3-1 with a named scorer has me marked |  | | |
| Self Service 2015, posted by sum our legends, and TOOT is back :D on 13:27 - Apr 1 with 1895 views | Leadbelly |
Bet 365 ad for me too. Clearly not personalised as I've only ever had a flutter "on course". How would they know that...unless I'm being followed? | |
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