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Here, get your mind off the hurley-burley of PlanetSwans -- Music Quiz #1
at 03:14 3 Nov 2017

Music Quiz #1. [Older folks might have a slight advantage, I know, but not as much as a music enthusiast.]

Below the Questions and Rules is a link to a well-known popular song of years gone by -- with all well-known and potentially easily-recognizable answers.

First, the questions:

1. Name of song. [1 point]

2. Name of each instrument played, with the given and family name of the person playing it. [total 8 points]

3. Name of the musical group playing the song. [1 point]

Total points possible: 10 points, plus tiebreaker if needed.

First Tiebreaker: Name of musical genre of song. [1 extra point]

Second Tiebreaker, if needed: Earliest time of posting Private Message. [1 extra point.]


Rule 1. Only one entry per poster, posted by Private Message to Davillin, for entry security.

Rule 2. If you post more than one entry, only the first one [in time] will be recognized.

Rule 3. Spelling of answers must be close enough to be easily recognized without guesswork on my part.

Rule 4. Entry period ends at 10 p.m., Friday, 3 November, Swansea time [6 p.m. U.S. Eastern Time].

Here it is:

Special Hint: If the lyrics were sung, the title would appear for the first time at about 19-20 seconds in.
[Post edited 3 Nov 3:23]
After days of unpleasentness and negativity on PlanetSwans, it's time for . . .
at 02:19 1 Nov 2017

No Manager Fit to Manage any Premier League Side

NO FOOTBALL manager in the world is capable of managing any club in England’s top-flight to the standard required, fans have confirmed.

The millions that England’s top 20 teams earn from TV deals means they are all potential worldbeaters only let down by the men in the dugouts who are repeatedly proving unfit to lead them.

Football writer Tom Logan said: “Year in, year out, we’re seeing the same thing. Despite all the investment every team bar one is falling short, and it’s the managers to blame.

“Just look at the so-called elite. Klopp? Should be managing a Krautrock band. Mourinho? A specialist in the nil-nil away draw. Pochettino? Guardiola? Their win-loss ratios aren’t much better than men in flat caps in the 1950s.

“Across Europe it’s no better. Zidane? A gormless monkhead. Ancelotti? Open a pizzeria, already. There’s not a manager on the planet up to the job.

“We need to plough government funding into artificial intelligence. Quantum managers capable of trillions of tactical calculations in a nanosecond. It’s what Stoke and West Brom deserve.”
[Post edited 1 Nov 2:21]
Dav's Stats
at 22:05 28 Oct 2017

I had a helluva time putting these together, partly due to the result, partly due to weakened concentration the result caused, and partly due to the persistent intrusion of the knowledge that we need Leicester to defeat "Moneybags-to-paupers" Everton tomorrow.

Why do some songs, 'though very sad, give us pleasure? Try this one.
at 20:45 26 Oct 2017

As I was listening to some of the Perry Como songs on my computer, I was struck by this question, "Why do some songs, 'though very sad, give us pleasure?" This one does me.

Before I give some of my possible answers, I'd like to hear your answers, please.

Thermostat problem at home? Well, I have had it.
at 01:42 25 Oct 2017

Have you had this thermostat problem at home? Well, I certainly did, and it was a major factor in the divorce proceedings. Read this:

Women Forced to Attend Thermostat Awareness Course

WOMEN across the UK are being forced to attend a one-day thermostat awareness course to learn how they work.

The courses, run by the Department of Energy, are compulsory for anyone who has committed two or more thermostat misuse infractions in a 72-hour period and are projected to save the UK millions of pounds in bills.

Instructor Dr Thomas Booker said: “This is a thermostat. It can sense the temperature.

“When set to, for example, 21 degrees, it will regulate the temperature of your home at 21 degrees by turning the heating off or on without – and this is important – any need for manual adjustment.

“If you are feeling a little cold and adjust it upwards to, say, 30 degrees, it will not provide a short-term boost of heat but will begin heating the entire home to tropical temperatures. The opposite will happen if adjusted down, though that’s of course entirely theoretical.

“The way to operate a thermostat is simply to choose the temperature you’re most comfortable with and to leave it alone and not touch it. Let me repeat that: pick a temperature, do not touch it and leave it alone.”

Attendee Donna Sheridan said: “Nah. I still don’t get it.”
My heartfelt comment.
at 23:47 21 Oct 2017

Outgoing message on your telephone's answering machcine
at 03:22 19 Oct 2017

I like to have fun with the outgoing message on my telephone's answering machine, and have done so since my first one

Please allow me to give my two favourites, followed by a question for any of you who have done so also.

1. On there now. You call and get my answering machine, which says first, in an answering machine sonorous voice, "The answering machine is off."

After about 5 or 6 seconds, a softer voice says, "Nah. Just kidding." 5 or seconds after that comes the beep.

2. My all-time favourite from many years ago. My son Mark helped me to record it.

With a very long extension cord, I put the answering machine out in front of my house, right on the curb, with Mark instructed and at the controls.

I put my Norton Commando on the street immediately adjacent to the answering machine, and after giving Mark a silent signal to start recording the outgoing message, I kick started the Norton and gave a bit too much throttle so it really "roared" into life.

I then took it at full throttle and full throat through the gears for about a hundred yards, whereupon Mark, as instructed, stopped recording and let it beep.

When a caller got my answering machine, what he heard was one hellishly loud motorcycle snarling away.

No further information or message. Perhaps it required a bit of a poet to get the message, but I don't care. I got it.

p.s. I wish i still had that tape recording. Perhaps I do, in some long-lost box.

Have any of you done a madman outgoing message that you'd like to share?
[Post edited 19 Oct 3:24]
In which hemispheres will China's space station [or biggest piece] crash?
at 02:57 19 Oct 2017

In which hemispheres will China's space station [or biggest piece] crash?

Your Vote:

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U.S. "soccer" lambasted
at 17:04 18 Oct 2017

I told you.

You saw it yourself firsthand with Brad Bobbly.

Now read what a former U.S. player, with 112 U.S. caps, has to say:

Claudio Reyna Eviscerates US Soccer as “Arrogant” and “Obnoxious”

By Kyle Bonn, Oct 18, 2017, 9:50 AM EDT

Former USMNT captain Claudio Reyna has come out guns blazing after the Americans failed to qualify for the 2018 World Cup, repeatedly condemning the mentality of the coaches and players in the wake of the debacle.

Speaking to’s Ives Galarcep, the usually hushed NYCFC Sporting Director put the USMNT on blast during his lengthy chat. “You travel to Spain, Argentina, Germany,” Reyna said, “and you run into coaches and sporting directors and there’s a humility about their work that doesn’t exist here, and that’s, for me, seeing it, is to me a big concern.”

“When you have a disappointment like last week, and we’ve had past disappointments as well, and we’ll have disappointments in the future, but what we need to understand that it’s for me behavioral.”

Reyna, who garnered 112 caps during his time with the US National Team as a midfielder, questioned the advancement of the game in the United States, looking to differentiate an increase in popularity from headway on the field. “What I think has happened in the past 10 years is we’re confusing investment, expansion, growth, and all these other things with progress,” Reyna said. “All these things have sort of created a feeling that we’re progressing, but I call it expanding, growth and more fans. From the general growth side it’s happening, but are we really progressing? When I look around at certain levels I don’t see progress happening.”

The 44-year-old eventually let the heads of the federation have it, saying nothing will improve no matter who is in charge unless the mentality of those at the helm changes. “People are sitting together and thinking about strategies and how we’re going to get better,” Reyna said. “We need a little humility and modesty at the table. Unfortunately we have a little too much ‘Mr. I Know Everything’, ‘Mr. Arrogance’, ‘Mr. Obnoxious’, ‘Mr. Loud’, and when those get together nothing happens.”

Before finishing out his chat with Goal, Reyna made sure to point out that the country has quality players at its disposal, and that it’s on the federation to develop them and pull the best out of them, or else the disappointments will continue.

“There’s a lot of positives despite the disappointing result that we had last week,” Reyna said. “I think we’re all embarrassed. I’m embarrassed as a former player that I have to go around and have people make fun of us, and get texts from my friends in Europe who remind me we’ll be on [vacation] next summer. I can laugh, but it hurts. It definitely hurts.”
Yup, they're up – Dav's Stats, that is
at 04:35 17 Oct 2017

[much improved]
Dav's Stats
at 18:42 14 Oct 2017

Apologies to those who care, but I can't get to my website at the moment. I'll try again later.

Too bad, too, because they all look a lot better today.
[Post edited 14 Oct 18:50]
Let's say there are three posters on here with a sense of humour . . .
at 20:31 13 Oct 2017

Let's say, for the sake of discussion, that there are three regular posters on Planet Swans who have a genuine and hearty sense of humour [plus Dav].

Name one and we'll see who they are.
Now this is real music. From the 1930s.
at 23:05 5 Oct 2017

I remember this as a very popular song on the radio from my early childhood This is the original artist, but it was covered by dozens of musicians for years.

[Don't try to keep your feet from tapping or you'll throw out your knees.]

p.s. the original title was "Flat Foot Floozie," later changed to "Flat Foot Floogie" to get past the unofficial radio censors.
Dav's Stats Updated and Uploaded -- Send children and old folks out to play befo
at 18:44 30 Sep 2017

Send children and old folks outside to play before opening Dav's Stats, URL below.

Dav's Stats Updated and Uploaded -- Send children and old folks out to play befo
Normally I care not for international football, but . . .
at 02:40 30 Sep 2017

Normally, I care not a dot for international football, but this time I'm glad to see that Wilfried got a call-up, hoping he gets some playing time and scores. It will do him -- and Swansea City -- a lot of good. And he deserves it.

Come on Wilfried Bony, score some goals for the Elephants.

Well, O.K., but that doesn't sound quite as good as "score some goals for Swansea."
Quiz. New U.S. [MLS] attendance record? 40k+, 50k+. 60k+. 70k+ ?
at 13:17 29 Sep 2017

Quiz: New U.S. [MLS] attendance record? 42,254, 53,671. 61,487. 70,425 ?

My eldest, who lives in Atlanta, sent me this recently.
Have you ever heard Perry Como? If not, you missed something wonderful.
at 22:27 28 Sep 2017

I remember as a youngster [that's a long time ago] that Perry Como was one of my father's favourites. He never missed one of Perry's shows if he could help it. He referred to hm affectionately as "The Italian Barber," and reveled in the fact that Perry was also a Pennsylvanian.

Here's one of my favourite songs, made popular by the also-wonderful singer, Don MacLean, here done by Perry Como to the obvious delight of his audience.:

Dav's Stats for 2017-2018 have been compiled and updated
at 13:41 24 Sep 2017

Dav's Stats for 2017-2018 have been compiled and updated. I suggest that those of you who find them of value please bookmark the URL. Although I fully intend to keep them up to date at all times, I may well not "advertise" them after every game, so having the URL bookmarked will allow you to check them without a prompt.
All of the media articles about Clement's "mea culpa"
at 20:42 23 Sep 2017

O.K., then, the manager has accepted some degree of responsibility for today's unnecessary loss. Now what's he gonna do about it?

Here's my suggestion. Imagine that the first six games had been managed by Boob Bradley [actually not hard to imagine, given the constant juggling of lineups with players in-and-out, with no real continuity, especially midfield and forward, as well as unfathomable changes in formation and concomitant tactics].

Then recall how you [Clement] handled that after you took over. Measurable fewer personnel changes and fewer tactical and strategic changes. And a brilliant midfielder who, as usual, took control of the game and got it going "the Swansea way." [Thanks, mug-donor.]

Finally, either get out your "Don't Panic. Play Leon" mug again, or get a new one -- ""Don't panic. Play Leon or Roque." With an addendum of "from the start of every game." Well, that's a bit long for a single mug, so let's do a second mug with the latter text.

Just get it done, please.
Just because they have a platform in the media and on the Internet doesn't mean
at 20:18 23 Sep 2017

Just because they have a platform in the media and on the Internet doesn't mean what they write is right.

From my viewpoint, this is amply illustrated in one comment by Dominic Booth and Andrew Gwylim in their article in Wales Online at:

They praised Jordan Ayew's workrate with this damning bit of faint praise: "What he lacks in skill and technical ability, Ayew more than makes up for in work rate and perseverance. He could be seen halfway through the opening period in the left-back position jostling away from Watford's press to win the Swans a throw-in. It typified everything he offers to this Swansea side."

As did his brother when he was here, Jordan lacks discipline. Whenever he draws my attention during a game, I have no idea what position he is supposed to be playing. I still don't. Perhaps I'm old-fashioned, but whenever a player is making a nuisance of himself where he doesn't belong, his absence from his assigned position means that one link in a chain is missing.

The same applies to his propensity to dribble into a crowd when the Swansea style is to pass crisply and retain possession.

I hasten to add that the writers got a more important point right -- well, kind of -- when they bemoaned the absence of Leon Britton. A more accurate opinion would have included Roque Mesa -- "the absence of either Leon or Roque or another player with the same skill set and extensive tactical and strategic understanding and play."
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