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Remain Calm
at 09:09 19 May 2024

Those of a nervous disposition may wish to look away. Lock all pets indoors and close all windows. Gather your loved ones together for safety and comfort at this time.

Jordan Archer, our Reserve Keeper Of Hearts, is gone.

Stay strong.
Non-QPR: Come On Ipswich!
at 08:06 4 May 2024

I Mean, There Are No Words
at 20:56 30 Apr 2024

Edit - it's the word 'again' that just kills me.

This channel seems to specialise in songs like this, such as the easy listening classic: 'Daydreamin' (About Taking A Huge Dump, Then Getting Up To Piss On The Dump And Cut It In Half)'
[Post edited 30 Apr 21:15]
at 09:30 11 Apr 2024

Obviously, this is an opinion thread, so it will solve nothing but I think we should try to flog Illy in the Summer (subject to him not doing a 10 stretch in the Belgian Scrubs). My reasoning is as follows:

Firstly, If we're ever going to get a reasonable fee for him, it needs to be sooner rather than later. He's as fit as a fiddle, no AFCON next season, his stats are right up there: it's about as attractive a proposition as he's going to get and, if we wait, we'll lose the opportunity. Imagine we waited another year for the Eze sale - it'd be the BOS situation again.

Secondly, and on a purely personal level, he's becoming increasingly predictable: get ball, dribble to edge of box, ignore overlapping runner, cut in on the right foot, edge of box, shoot on angle, rinse, repeat up to 20 times per match. If I can see it, then of course our oppo has prepped for it. We either adapt or die.

Finally, the team dynamic. I don't know professional football coaching from a hole in the ground but having a 'write the theme tune, sing the theme tune' player in the team is predicated on that player producing an end product. We call Dykes, Frey et al names because they don't score a lot. If Illy used the overlap more often, or even just crossed more regularly, our limited strikers might stand more of a chance. They might still be shite, but at least they can prove it on their own terms.

I'd sell. Would you?
The Game Has Jumped The Shark
at 07:27 5 Apr 2024

An article for the more financially astute here. Not me: I invested all my funds in Mrs Brown's Boys action figures.

The stat that shocked me the most was that over the period 2014-2023, Nottingham Forest's net spend was only £12m behind Real Madrid!
Hayden Article
at 11:16 2 Apr 2024

I know - it's The Sun but it popped up on my feed this morning and he seems really positive about life at the Rs.
Trying Not To Judge
at 12:07 3 Mar 2024

Nothing to do with football. My better half was at work the other day, when a colleague mentioned that she had just admitted a patient who had been run over by a mobility scooter whilst queuing at Greggs.

I can't picture this without smirking.
American Sports
at 20:54 10 Feb 2024

Fetch Spunkenmeier III, DVT News
'It's Superbowel Sunday and the Kansas Shitty Qweefs are up against the San Francisco 69ers to decide who takes home the Panzerball title! Kansas coach Lazarus Huttenhüber can call on the recently returned Anus Krankyanker to lead the de-fensive line, after his return from hair strain. On the opposing side, San Francisco's veteran manager Glans McGee will have a full starting line, including Deep Midcentrefieldsman Eucan Tutchdis, who has recently celebrated the birth of his first sea monkeys. Whatever happens, we can say 'Go Sports!'
Season's Gruntings
at 14:02 24 Dec 2023

Have a good Christmas, you beautiful people!
'Lost The Terraces'
at 09:24 29 Oct 2023

Was thinking about this whilst reading the posts on here: you hear a lot about a manager 'losing the dressing room' but I think that a certain shower of fcukwits wearing the Hoops have actually managed to 'lose the terraces'.

Seriously, there are so many on here, of whom I am one, who have openly stated that the 'hate' this group or are waiting for one, some or all of them to get a right fcuking coating off courtesy of the incoming boss / Bermondsey Dave (delete as applicable).

Frankly, I wouldn't give the steam off my piss to some of these shitehawks.
The Season So Far?
at 07:57 14 Oct 2023

Caption Competition?
at 08:48 16 Sep 2023

'I swear to you Sincs, two blue pills and it went about this big for 4 hours. It was frankly exhausting...'
Considered Take(s)..?
at 11:05 17 Aug 2023

I used a couple of gifs in the Match Fred which basically said that I believed, after perusing the team sheet, that we were fcuked. And not in a nice way.

However, as things went on -bearing in mind we still lost - I ended up feeling pretty positive. I have only seen clips but listened to the Radio London stuff via the Web and it seems that, last night, we were less fcuked than I may have implied.

The feeling I get this morning, reading through the Just-Backs and comments from the faithful is that there were some good things going on, even if the result was entirely predictable. My take is this: one of the better-run clubs in the league, who were clearly going for it, couldn't put our under-strength side to bed in 90 minutes - even though we lost our main striker and starting keeper to injury, featured 2 academy debuts and played a 74 yr old right wing back.

Not what I saw coming at all. Worth mentioning that 2 of the back 4 selected for Watford played last night in a 3 with Sam Field out of position - and after the 90 we were still in it!
Gifs That Accurately Illustrate What Norf Is Up To Tonight
at 20:15 12 Aug 2023

Dev Squad Wins
at 22:02 8 Aug 2023

Tell you what, A Trialist had a good game.

Straw clutching here: Richards didn't explode into a thousand tiny pieces, one of the trialists was a centre back and Aoraha (Ooarooaray) got 2.
How Bad Is It Really?
at 21:11 29 Jul 2023

I mean, is it Ray Harford bad or what? Is it 'Ollie's 3 lists / squad of 12 players 3 of whom are goalies' bad? Is it 'We're saved! Here's the ABC Corporation!' bad?

Fcuk, it's not Joey Barton bad, is it?

You can tell me. I can take it.
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