| Thinking about 'the inevitable' 10:52 - Jul 30 with 8369 views | MrSwerve |
Hopefully not too morbid a post for a Monday morning.
I'm now in my 30's, with my parents approaching their mid to late 60's, and I find myself increasingly thinking about how I will cope or learn to accept when the inevitable does happen. Thankfully they are still both in good health (touch wood), so there is nothing to worry about as such, I just find myself thinking about it more and more.
Is this something that sounds familiar to posters on here, and how did you cope when your parents did pass? Maybe the sharing of stories will also be some 'self help'. |  |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 11:00 - Jul 30 with 5189 views | omarjack |
You're lucky that you have such regard to your parents. And I believe they share the same sentiment towards you.
Trust me when I tell you, It's rarer than you think.
My advise is, Make the best out of your life with them. Live it day by day and make every day matter around them. Make them happy and when (hopefully in a very, very long time) the inevitable happens, you'll have no regrets knowing you've been great to them and they had a good run.
Mushy, sappy sh!t some might say..but that's what life is really about. [Post edited 30 Jul 2018 11:02]
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 11:05 - Jul 30 with 5166 views | moonie |
You ve got a pm |  | | |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 11:24 - Jul 30 with 5128 views | LeonWasGod |
I guess we're at different stages, as from the title I assumed you were talking about yourself!
I've lost my mum and all grandparents (was solely responsible for looking after my last gran, so went through it all first hand) . In my limited experience it's not the dying that's tough, it's coping with whatever ba@stard disease kicks in to end it all. In my mum's case (MND) it was a blessed relief when she went. And my gran too (dementia, topped off by cancer).
That doesn't sound particularly reassuring, but it's how things panned out for me. |  | | |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 14:47 - Jul 30 with 4990 views | byron |
Don’t ever take anything for granted would be my advice, either their health or your own.
Some people have really shiiiiity lives and many many family’s fall out. If you have common interests with your mum or dad, you will remember these fondly when they are no longer about. |  |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 14:59 - Jul 30 with 4962 views | JACKMANANDBOY |
Some good advice here already
My perspective is that I had a good chat with my mum before she went, she'd been ill and we talked about the inevitable, she was clear about no more medical intervention and wanted me to get on with my life as life is too short. Make sure your parents know how much you respect them, they'll be made up to hear how much you appreciate them. |  |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 15:17 - Jul 30 with 4925 views | Swanjaxs |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 14:47 - Jul 30 by byron |
Don’t ever take anything for granted would be my advice, either their health or your own.
Some people have really shiiiiity lives and many many family’s fall out. If you have common interests with your mum or dad, you will remember these fondly when they are no longer about. |
Excellent advice sir! After your fine Pembrey thread I'm starting to warm to you Byron, you have it in you to become a valued bluebird poster like Taffpunk... keep it up butt 👠|  |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 16:51 - Jul 30 with 4827 views | byron |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 15:17 - Jul 30 by Swanjaxs |
Excellent advice sir! After your fine Pembrey thread I'm starting to warm to you Byron, you have it in you to become a valued bluebird poster like Taffpunk... keep it up butt 👠|
Whhaaaaaaaaat! Don’t tell anyone ok. Keeping on thread, my old man helped me renovate houses when I was in my 20’s, sometimes it was hard work, literally and mentally, looking back now I cherish those covered in mortar and pipes leaking days..... | |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 17:23 - Jul 30 with 4753 views | trampie |
My advice to Swerve is FFS grow a pair. |  |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 17:38 - Jul 30 with 4719 views | JackBaston |
All I can suggest bro is to not worry about it, easier said than done
People can die at any time, and I'm one to stay awake at night worrying about death, but its out of everyones control
One of my best friends died when I was 19 to an Ied in Afghan, shortly after another friend died playing rugby due to heart failure, my granddad died suddenly to a chest infection despite being incredibly active and well
Just make sure you have no regrets for when they do pass, whether it be tomorrow or 40 years from now |  | | |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 17:56 - Jul 30 with 4683 views | raynor94 |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 17:23 - Jul 30 by trampie |
My advice to Swerve is FFS grow a pair. |
 my parents always taught me if you haven't anything good to say, don't say anything at all. |  |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:20 - Jul 30 with 4625 views | MrSwerve |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 17:23 - Jul 30 by trampie |
My advice to Swerve is FFS grow a pair. |
Wow, I thought even on Planet Swans people would be intelligent enough to have a fairly serious conversation without being a bit of a tw@t, obviously not.
Hopefully people that you know in real life will or have shown you a bit more compassion when you've lost loved ones (if you have any, with that attitude). | |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:28 - Jul 30 with 4608 views | MrSwerve |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 17:38 - Jul 30 by JackBaston |
All I can suggest bro is to not worry about it, easier said than done
People can die at any time, and I'm one to stay awake at night worrying about death, but its out of everyones control
One of my best friends died when I was 19 to an Ied in Afghan, shortly after another friend died playing rugby due to heart failure, my granddad died suddenly to a chest infection despite being incredibly active and well
Just make sure you have no regrets for when they do pass, whether it be tomorrow or 40 years from now |
Sorry to hear this.
Maybe the fact that I've had the death of two school friends in the last year has subconsciously made me think about it. I think 'worry' is probably the wrong adjective for how I feel...I'm not losing sleep over it and it's not stressing me out. I just see friends with their parents dying and think to myself, dear god, how must that feel? | |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:30 - Jul 30 with 4598 views | trampie |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:20 - Jul 30 by MrSwerve |
Wow, I thought even on Planet Swans people would be intelligent enough to have a fairly serious conversation without being a bit of a tw@t, obviously not.
Hopefully people that you know in real life will or have shown you a bit more compassion when you've lost loved ones (if you have any, with that attitude). |
You are old enough to know better, reads like a trolling thread.
Lots of people don't know how to show compassion, ive been praised on a few occasions for it, ive spoken to people about difficult situations they are facing and ive been told that people they know well have walked across the other side of the street because they don't know what to say.
Your post is a nonsense post for a grown up to put up, what do you want and expect people to say ?, of course you should value every minute of your time with your friends and family but that go's without saying, that is why your post comes across as trolling. | |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:31 - Jul 30 with 4594 views | Cooperman |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:20 - Jul 30 by MrSwerve |
Wow, I thought even on Planet Swans people would be intelligent enough to have a fairly serious conversation without being a bit of a tw@t, obviously not.
Hopefully people that you know in real life will or have shown you a bit more compassion when you've lost loved ones (if you have any, with that attitude). |
Sad eh? |  |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:32 - Jul 30 with 4584 views | MrSwerve |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:30 - Jul 30 by trampie |
You are old enough to know better, reads like a trolling thread.
Lots of people don't know how to show compassion, ive been praised on a few occasions for it, ive spoken to people about difficult situations they are facing and ive been told that people they know well have walked across the other side of the street because they don't know what to say.
Your post is a nonsense post for a grown up to put up, what do you want and expect people to say ?, of course you should value every minute of your time with your friends and family but that go's without saying, that is why your post comes across as trolling. |
I am not a troll.
Bore off. | |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:34 - Jul 30 with 4579 views | Cooperman |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:30 - Jul 30 by trampie |
You are old enough to know better, reads like a trolling thread.
Lots of people don't know how to show compassion, ive been praised on a few occasions for it, ive spoken to people about difficult situations they are facing and ive been told that people they know well have walked across the other side of the street because they don't know what to say.
Your post is a nonsense post for a grown up to put up, what do you want and expect people to say ?, of course you should value every minute of your time with your friends and family but that go's without saying, that is why your post comes across as trolling. |
Lots of people don’t know how to show compassion - yep. | |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:48 - Jul 30 with 4543 views | trampie |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:28 - Jul 30 by MrSwerve |
Sorry to hear this.
Maybe the fact that I've had the death of two school friends in the last year has subconsciously made me think about it. I think 'worry' is probably the wrong adjective for how I feel...I'm not losing sleep over it and it's not stressing me out. I just see friends with their parents dying and think to myself, dear god, how must that feel? |
Look if your parents die when you are young [child/teenager], bury your head in the sand, you will have them on your mind every minute of every day, eventually over time, might be years, it will be down to every hour or so and then after say a decade down to everyday things in life jogging your memory, even down to things on tv reminding you.
If you start to have thoughts, block them out immediately, if you are good at it, you wont remember your parents birthdays, age, date of death etc etc [and that is probably a good thing in the circumstance]
That is how to cope - head in the sand.
Now as regards the 'correct order of things', middle aged adults losing parents that have had a full life, celebrate their life, think how lucky they were and think how lucky you are.
As regards older people that are with it mentally losing very old parents and they want sympathy over and over again those people are just attention seekers and I think you will find them on this board, very sad individuals indeed.
When people have known very sad times, tragic times actually, its hard for those people to give sympathy to people that have been lucky and have nothing to be sad about at all in the big scheme of things as regards the way of the World. | |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:55 - Jul 30 with 4525 views | trampie |
Gower Jack bury your head in the sand, its the best way to cope with true tragedy if you are a child but older enough to understand.
All this remembering is for 'lucky' people only, forget them, forget even when their birthdays are, don't visit their graves, don't let your mind go back there, by avoiding you stay strong. | |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:55 - Jul 30 with 4521 views | Gowerjack |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:30 - Jul 30 by trampie |
You are old enough to know better, reads like a trolling thread.
Lots of people don't know how to show compassion, ive been praised on a few occasions for it, ive spoken to people about difficult situations they are facing and ive been told that people they know well have walked across the other side of the street because they don't know what to say.
Your post is a nonsense post for a grown up to put up, what do you want and expect people to say ?, of course you should value every minute of your time with your friends and family but that go's without saying, that is why your post comes across as trolling. |
Trampie
You're a fûcking idiot. |  |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:58 - Jul 30 with 4508 views | trampie |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:55 - Jul 30 by Gowerjack |
Trampie
You're a fûcking idiot. |
Why do you say that ?, perhaps this is a topic I know lots about. | |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 19:03 - Jul 30 with 4485 views | Cooperman |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 18:58 - Jul 30 by trampie |
Why do you say that ?, perhaps this is a topic I know lots about. |
People cope with tragedy and trauma in many different ways. Burying your head in the sand isn’t an option for everyone. | |
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| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 19:03 - Jul 30 with 4484 views | moonie |
Trample
I used to think you were simply a backward racist piece of filth .You re Wales is overrun by English proves that .
This latest effort shames you deeply. You give tacit support for terrorists , you insult a whole nation, you are really found out .
I wouldn't wipe my feet on you | | | |
| Thinking about 'the inevitable' on 19:06 - Jul 30 with 4478 views | JACKMANANDBOY |
Good grief, some disappointing stuff on this thread. | |
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