| Shìt Joke thread..... 21:41 - Nov 20 with 77985 views | Swanjaxs |
My blond 19 year old next door neighbour has just asked me if I know about missing items from her washing line? ...
I nearly shìt her knickers 😮
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 13:06 - May 16 with 2793 views | Swanjaxs |
| Shìt Joke thread..... on 13:02 - May 16 by BrynCartwright |
I just read a book about the history of glue..
Couldn't put it down. |
"Buy your own fùcking glue" 😛 | |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 10:54 - May 18 with 2631 views | theloneranger |
My uncle was a sh1te ventriloquist ...
He used to stick his finger in my arse, and ask me not to say anything!! |  |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! 😎 |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 12:17 - May 18 with 2600 views | Joe_bradshaw |
Dublin radio were asking callers to tell them about their experiences with working from home.
Pat calls and the DJ asks how working from home went for him.
"Terrible" says Pat. "The missus is absolutely fuming with me and I can't understand why"
"What happened, Pat?"
"She went out early to do her hospital shift and I thought I'd work from home. I made brilliant progress and by the time she came home I'd tarmacked the hall, the lounge and the kitchen". |  |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 12:46 - May 18 with 2579 views | theloneranger |
At a couple's conference, the speaker mentioned that couples are so disconnected these days, that 85% of all husbands don't know their wives favourite flower.
Paddy turned to his wife and whispered ... "It's self raising, Isn't it??" | |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! 😎 |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 12:52 - May 18 with 2573 views | Highjack |
Robin said to Batman “the Batmobile isn’t starting.” Batman said “Have you checked the battery?”
“What’s a Terry?” Replied Robin. |  |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 15:01 - May 18 with 2530 views | Cooperman |
Paddy & Murphy are sat in the airport ready to go on holiday.
Paddy says to Murphy “fuk I wish I’d brought the telly, Murph”
“Why, are you bored, Pad?”
“No Murph, I left the passports on top of it”. |  |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 15:09 - May 18 with 2525 views | Highjack |
Why did Humpty Dumpty push his girlfriend off the wall?
So he could see her crack. | |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 15:36 - May 18 with 2504 views | theloneranger |
BREAKING NEWS ...
A man who took Ryanair to court after losing his luggage, has lost his case!! | |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! 😎 |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 15:57 - May 18 with 2489 views | thornabyswan |
| Shìt Joke thread..... on 15:36 - May 18 by theloneranger |
BREAKING NEWS ...
A man who took Ryanair to court after losing his luggage, has lost his case!! |
I went to a seafood disco and pulled a muscle. |  |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 16:16 - May 18 with 2482 views | Highjack |
I got into a fight with a massive guy the other day. He said “I’m going to mop the floor with your face.” I said “You’ll be sorry.” He said “Why’s that then?” I said “you won’t be able to get into the corners very well”. | |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 20:33 - May 18 with 2443 views | Swanjaxs |
My father drowned in a vat of beer.
Mind you he got out to go to the toilet twice. | |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 21:12 - May 18 with 2420 views | thornabyswan |
| Shìt Joke thread..... on 20:33 - May 18 by Swanjaxs |
My father drowned in a vat of beer.
Mind you he got out to go to the toilet twice. |
Sad news about that sultana drowing got pulled under by a current | |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 21:33 - May 18 with 2398 views | Cooperman |
I was on the phone to Babestation the other night and the young lass said “hey big boy, what can I do fo you”
I said “Fuking hide, quick. My Mrs is coming down the stairs and I’ve lost the remote”. | |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 00:34 - May 19 with 2346 views | Swanjaxs |
A gang has been caught making counterfeit Kipling Bakewell tarts.
Police say they're exceedingly good fakes. | |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 00:38 - May 19 with 2342 views | airedale |
| Shìt Joke thread..... on 21:33 - May 18 by Cooperman |
I was on the phone to Babestation the other night and the young lass said “hey big boy, what can I do fo you”
I said “Fuking hide, quick. My Mrs is coming down the stairs and I’ve lost the remote”. |
Is the answer a fish? |  | | |
| Shìt Joke thread..... on 07:15 - May 19 with 2308 views | Highjack |
A young lad went to his father. “Dad, why is my sister called Rose?”
The dad said “Well your mum and I had a deal. If we had a baby girl she’d name her after something she loves. If she had a boy I would choose the name. Your mum loves roses, so she called your sister Rose.”
“Thanks Dad.”
“No problem Anal.” | |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 09:17 - May 19 with 2269 views | theloneranger |
My girlfriend keeps telling me that having a small cock is nothing to worry about.
I still wish she didn't have one!! | |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! 😎 |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 06:34 - May 20 with 2153 views | Highjack |
A man went into a library and said “Do you have any books about turtles?”
“Hard back?” The librarian asked.
“Yes with little heads and flippers.” | |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 01:44 - May 21 with 2018 views | Swanjaxs |
Polce toay have sa they are nvestgatng a string of ID thefts. 👮â€â™‚ï¸ | |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 20:35 - May 22 with 1738 views | dickythorpe |
There's a new drug on the market for depressed lesbians.
It's called Tri-cox-agin |  | | |
| Shìt Joke thread..... on 20:42 - May 22 with 1728 views | Robbie |
Let my mate 20 grand to get plastic surgery .
Cannot recognise him now to get my money back . ( Copyright Owen Money , not me ) . [Post edited 22 May 2020 20:43]
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 20:44 - May 22 with 1722 views | dickythorpe |
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?
He pasta-way. | | | |
| Shìt Joke thread..... on 20:50 - May 22 with 1716 views | Robbie |
Woke up in the middle of the night recently , there was a burglar in the house looking for valuables .
So I got up to give him a hand . ( Copyright Tim Vine , not me ) . | | | |
| Shìt Joke thread..... on 08:16 - May 23 with 1643 views | theloneranger |
CSI Cardiff has been scrapped as soon as production started.
It's hard to do a crime show, when every member of the city has no dental records and the same DNA!! | |
| Everyday above ground ... Is a good day! 😎 |
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| Shìt Joke thread..... on 10:49 - May 23 with 1608 views | sainthelens |
| Shìt Joke thread..... on 08:16 - May 23 by theloneranger |
CSI Cardiff has been scrapped as soon as production started.
It's hard to do a crime show, when every member of the city has no dental records and the same DNA!! |
In an 11 page thread.....that's my fave.
Bravo sir. |  | | |
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